A Breath of Fresh Air

Friday

It's a hot day out on the beach. I'm standing at the shore watching the waves roll in, and a handsome surfer dude catches my attention. He's carrying his surfboard and has long, flowing hair.

We make eye contact and he walks up to me.

SURFER DUDE: Kiss me.

"Uh, what?"

SURFER DUDE: You heard me. You know you want to.

"I...kinda do."

He leans in and we start making out. I have to say, his tongue is very slobbery.

I open my eyes and see Baxter laying on my chest licking my face.

I knew that had to be a dream.

"Ew Bax, I love you buddy but I don't know where your mouth's been."

I gently push him to the side and get up out of bed to go rinse my mouth and wipe my lips. I'm still in my clothes from yesterday, so I guess I cried myself to sleep. What a fucking day. Hopefully this trip will be a breath of fresh air.

After getting ready, I head back to my room. I change into a fresh blue t-shirt and decide to wear the only pair of shorts I own other than the gym shorts. We've been over how I hate shorts, but it's projected to be 94 degrees in Florida today and I'd rather not hate my life anymore than I already do.

I put my trusty hat on and start packing my bag. I'm only taking the bare essentials - a couple pairs of jeans and short sleeve shirts, swim attire, bathroom stuff like toothpaste, and of course, my newly scratched iPad. I'm still salty about that.

I didn't ever eat dinner last night so I'm ravenous like you wouldn't believe. I meander to the kitchen to raid the fridge, but there's not much other than expired milk and some leftover Hungry Howie's pizza from a couple days ago. I scan the pantry, but there's nothing of interest there either. And all of the cinnamon rolls are gone. Bummer. Guess I'm just gonna starve.

The house is peaceful for once, so everyone else must still be asleep. I check my phone to see it's 6:45. Can't believe I woke up so early on a non-school day.

I head to my room to watch the new Good Mythical Morning episode. Rhett and Link are tasting cereals and trying to determine the best kind. The winner ends up being Cinnamon Toast Crunch, which I wholeheartedly agree with.

Damn, now I want some Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

I hear footsteps that sound like bigfoot, so Dave must be up. Not a second later, there's a loud knock at the door.

"Yes?"

DAVE: OPEN UP!

I reluctantly roll my desk chair over to the door and unlock it. Dave pushes it wide open and it hits the wall, knocking my skateboard down.

DAVE: I'm not fixin' to sit here half the damn day waiting for your ass to get ready!

"I'm ready! Jeez!"

DAVE: Hey, don't start with the attitude today! You're lucky Hannity was on last night or you wouldn't have gotten away so easily.

Baxter starts barking at Dave. Good dog.

DAVE: Control that nutty mutt of yours, by the way!

He slams the door, and I pet Baxter. You can't tell me a dog isn't a good judge of character.

I lean my board back up, grab my bag and walk out to the living room. Mom's making a pot of coffee and looks like she's still half-asleep. She yawns.