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have you ever loved someone that you cried?
it seems impossible to explain the feeling. but you can imagine it even if you've never been in love before. it is simply that powerful.
and terrifying. more terrifying than dying.
people say that love is happiness and easy. but for those who are broken, it is merely more pain and anxiety. to love someone so much that it compels you to sob, shifts the physical structure of your soul. perhaps it becomes larger as if you now have more life in you. or perhaps it becomes harder as if it's protecting itself from being shattered once more.
something so magnificent like a soul can be so delicate like thin ice.
have you ever loved someone so much that you wish you didn't?
because loving them only brings fear that they will leave. loving them gives you doubts that they can't possibly love you back just as much, if not more. loving them is like asking for a promise but never hearing an answer.
and they might love you just as much, if not more. but your foolish, restless heart cannot seem to absorb the very idea of someone loving you through all the bandaids that hold it together. why should someone ever love you? why would someone love you when there will always be someone better? why you? are you even someone who can be loved?
