Outgoing Stories

Sister (Part 2)

I can hear him behind the wall, getting ready for his first date. The door of his wardrobe squeaks open, then bumps closed as he picks his outfit. The water runs in the bathroom. The toilet gets flushed. I sit in my swivel chair, giggling to myself, imagining how he's probably pouring way too much perfume over himself and combs his hair. He's obsessed with his hair, and one of the most fun ways to send him into a meltdown is to ruffle in when passing him by. He's so silly sometimes.

I glance at the pages lying in the trey of my printer. The printouts of our chats with him. His secrets and fears. Perhaps I won't take them to school just yet. Perhaps just hinting that I have them would be enough to get him to behave. Hell, I'll make him kiss my feet and beg my forgiveness for what he's written about me. 'As ugly as they get'! 'Fat'! 'Jock'!

'I love here anyway.'

I sit in my chair, rocking back and forth. He's never said that before. He was always just an annoying little brother. There was never any indication of anything like that.

I can hear the rubber sound of his sneakers on the floor as he's heading to his door. Show-time. I slide off my chair and pick my red baseball cap. I wrote to him that Andrew would be wearing a red baseball cap. So, I'll meet him in the corridor now, and put the cap on, and then he'll know.

A nervous giggle can't quite make is past my constricted throat. I shouldn't stress about it. It's going to be fun. The look on his face will be something to taunt him with for years.

I pause before the door and throw a glance at the printed pages in my tray. Not yet. I'll save those for later.

I hide the baseball cap behind my back and step into the corridor just as he exits his room. He's wearing his blue tee shirt with Taylor Swift face printed on it—something he would never wear in front of his friends, but hey, he's heading to meet his soulmate, right? As I expected, his black hair is carefully combed and gleams with hair gel. He turns and sees me.

"Oh, hi," he says distractedly. "I'm heading out."

"Sure," I murmur. "Did you tell Mom or Dad?"

"Why? It's just a walk in the park."

My fingers tense around the cap behind my back.

"Did you tell them or not?"

He looks up at me, and a wide sheepish grin spreads on his face, despite his visible attempts to contain it.

"Don't tell them, okay? It's...a date."

His smile makes me falter. It looks so open.

"Huh?" I say.

"I have a date." He looks giddy, as if he's about to start bouncing up and down. "Don't tell anyone."

He heads for the stairway and I take an involuntary step after him, the cap heavy in my fingers.

"Daniel," I call, and he stops and looks back, still smiling. Excited. Vulnerable.

"What?"

She's a jock. As ugly as they get. Fat, too.

I love her anyway.

"Nothing," I say and make a vague gesture with my free hand. "You...look good." I pause. "She's a lucky girl."

He nods, his smile fading a bit. Then he pauses on the top stair, his hand on the handrail.

"It's not a girl," he says. "It's a boy. Do you mind?"

I can see him swallow hard as he stands there, waiting for my answer.

"No." I shake my head. "I don't...mind."

After the door bangs shut downstairs, I stagger back into my room and sink into my chair, letting the cap drop to the floor. Our chat window is still hovering on my screen, his avatar marked as 'offline'. He'll get online soon again, when he gets to the park and doesn't find the boy in a red baseball cap. Then he'll get online and ask Andrew where he is. And Andrew will answer...

"I had to go," I type. "But I saw you. You're beautiful." I pause, thinking. "You're okay, Daniel. I wish you luck."

I sit and wait, my finger hovering over the 'send' button.

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