Abaddon's Gift

Chapter Fifty-Eight

 Only a handful of students remained at Amos over winter break. That small handful would, from the sound of rumours and the like, spend their time drinking and such in their respective club rooms or dorm rooms. Leaving Amos virtually empty, as the faculty members also left for the holiday.

Servants remained, and a healer, who drew the short lot, in case of emergency.

Which meant that, for the first time in months, Naena could let her guard down just a little.

After seeing Maeno off to the teleporter office to spend his holiday with the Lugh family, she went back to her dorm room. There, she collected the dress Theon had purchased for her and took it to her workroom.

Magi Yole had assigned her a workroom in the area set aside for the Seven. The assignment had existed from the second week of school. He had instructed her on how to open the room and gave her several phrases she could use if she were caught wandering the halls. No one caught her heading in or out of the area, or if they had, they assumed she was making her way to Theon's study.

She set the dress carefully into a chest in the far corner and closed it. Atop it she placed the books and trinkets she had collected since arriving at Amos, as well as a candelabra with four half-burned candles. She moved to her work desk and sat there, staring at the chalkboard she had smuggled in from one of the empty classrooms.

Workrooms came with little in the way of furniture, but no rule said that she couldn't take from what wasn't being used—so long as she intended to return it.

She sighed and reached into her pocket, pulling out the little pearl and gold button she had taken from Graydon. With careful, practiced motions, she laid the spell around the button and set it on the desk.

"Bo's first principle: no symbol is one of itself unless you make it so, proved successful," Naena said to no one at all. "Maeno tested the Bo spell out using this method and ignoring the original creation, and it worked. He then inked it into his arm as a secondary experiment. I didn't agree with that as it is untested, but he's the spell mage."

Naena hesitated, feeling the heaviness come over her as her throat seemed to close up. She glared at the ceiling as she began crying, unable to stop herself even as she shook her head in annoyance. It would have been fine if Maeno had stayed, but he left.

She was alone.

All thought went from her head as she began weeping openly. She covered her face with her hands, furious with herself that she would cry over that as if it would change anything. For several minutes that was all she did, weep uncontrollably.

Finally she stood and sniffed, tears still pouring down her cheeks as she went to the chalkboard to put a check beside the principle. Still crying, she went to the serving trolly she had made off with and poured herself some water and grabbing a bite to eat.

Because, damn it, she hadn't eaten most of the day, and no one was there to see her cry and eat at the same time. Somehow, that made her weep harder, but she still ate. She always ate when she cried or when she felt sick. The body needed food to survive and grow. Denying it that wouldn't make things any easier and eating didn't slow down the healing.

As she realized how strange it was—as she always came to realize—that she ate where others would sit and moan or simply cry themselves out, her tears dried suddenly. She wiped her eyes and decided she wasn't angry with Maeno for leaving, or Graydon for not extending such an invitation to her.

She had been foolish to think the heir of the Pan family cared enough to bring her home for the holidays. A young woman's fancy, if anything.

And she didn't have time for that sort of thing.