A request for the lovely xnatalix19
As the shoot was winding down, feelings of dread were rising up almost consistently. Saying goodbye to Ally wasn't something she wanted to think about, wasn't remotely prepared for. The film had been her safe haven from the darkest point in her life and the mere thought of not seeing the same kind faces everyday, of not being able to work through familar pain and trauma, it was almost unthinkable.
In her trailer, Stefani sat, unmoving, waiting to be called to set. At her request, she was alone; hair and make-up were done and everyone had departed to give her some time to get ready for the upcoming scene.
The cup of coffee in her hands warmed them from the slight chill in the air and she shivered, forcing herself to center and focus on the little tendrils of steam dancing in front of her. It wasn't goodbye, not just yet. She had five more days of shooting. Five more days of hard, brutal work that would both precede and follow Jackson's death. Today was the very first of those and she knew she had to shake those feelings of impending doom off, fast, or the scene would never work.
It wasn't just Stefani saying goodbye, it was Ally beginning the process, albeit, unknowingly, of saying goodbye to Jack as he made his final decision. Though it was her job as Ally to be unaware of his plans, to be joyful and confident that she'd made the decision in refusing to go on tour, the dark knowledge of what was to happen next was haunting her.
Ally wasn't ready to leave Jack. And with that acknowledgment, as she tipped her face forward to catch some of the steam, she was nowhere ready to leave Bradley, either.
"What's going on?" Natali had asked over a late dinner one night, "and don't tell me nothing."
She had shrugged, too exhausted to do much more than slump over on the couch and pry noodles into her mouth with chopsticks. "I don't know what you want me to say."
"The truth would be nice." Natali nudged her ankle with her sock covered foot.
The television cast a blue glow in the darkened room and all she could manage was another half-hearted shrug, staring mindlessly at The Real Housewives. "I don't know how you can watch this."
Natali snatched the carton from her hands, resting it on the coffee table, ignoring her whine of protest. "And I don't know how you could be so fucking blase. We've all noticed it on set. You'd have to be blind not to. He's madly in love with you and if you ask me, the feeling is entirely mutual."
Natali was a no bullshit type of person and while normally, she loved it, was proud as hell of it, weariness pulsed through every single part of her body and she wasn't remotely interested in engaging in any sort of discussion about her feelings or lack thereof.
"Of course, I like him, Nat. He's become a good friend. And we're in love in a movie. That's what you're seeing. So you can take your blurred lines theory and go away."
But her sister couldn't be so easily deterred. "I haven't seen your eyes light up like that in a really long time. He makes you happy."
She couldn't refute that part of the argument. Bradley was special.
"He does," she acknowledged quietly, curling up to lie down. "But even if there was a shred of truth to what you're claiming...or an attraction," she spoke the word as though it were an atomic bomb that she held gingerly in the palm of her hand, "he has a girlfriend. A baby. And I have a boyfriend."
"Who've you been seeing like, for two seconds."
"Well, yeah, but what does that matter? He's kind and he treats me well. We have things in common."
