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Why?!

TIRGGER WARNING

You are getting tired of this world. You don't want to be in it anymore. You hate the bullies, the people who say you are a freak, a bitch, a whore, ect.. You want them to stop. Sam, Dean, and Castiel don't know about this. They just know that school sucks. You cut but they don't know it. You keep it where they can't see it. You don't want them to think you are weak and that you need help. You are strong but sometimes even the strong ones slip up.

You are tired of being the strong one so you stand there in the bathroom with the door locked and the water running. They don't know you what you are about to do. You turn off the bath water and strip down to bra and underwear and get in. You have the blade next to you. You cried for a while in there then you started to cut into your body what they say to you. How much it hurts is not compared to how much they hurt you.

You are laying there waiting to die. You are waiting to die of blood loss when you hear something at the door and you think you imagine it so you just let it go and lay your head back again. Then you hear Sam and Dean yelling for you. So you don't answer then they remember you were in the bathroom last time they saw you. They are banging on the door trying to kick it in and Dean calls Cas. When he gets there they explain everything. After that Cas zaps in. You are incintious.

Cas heals you but you are barley breathing. You have lost way to much blood. So then they lay you down and they take turns staying with you till you wake up. You started breathing more and more. You were starting to wake up very slowly and they all were realizing it so they all came in the room and about an hour later you woke up with Dean's head on your stomach, Sam holding your hand and laying down next to you and Cas was standing there waiting.

When you sat up they all wake up. Hey start to cry because they thought you would never wake up. Then they get really mad and start yelling. It's a jumble of words do you cant tell what you are saying so then you yell "everyone shut up." They all got quiet. "Ok Dean you go first."

" WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO THAT. YOU HAD US WORRIED YOU WERE GONNA DIE. DONT EVER DO THAT AGAIN." He said most of that in one breath. You started to cry. Then Sam said what he thought. "(Y/N) it's ok. We are here for you. Just don't ever do that again. We love you and would die if you died. Don't ever try that again." By this you are in tears crying so hard you can barley breath.

You know they love you. And from there you Try to tell them when you are feeling he need to cut. You still do every now and then but everytime you do, you tell them. They understand but eventually you stop. It took a while but you learned you are loved.