Can't Find My Way Home.

Daughter.

I look deep into the hollow green eyes that match my own. Dean softly asks, "Who in the hell are you?" I mutter, "I don't know, I'm hoping you can tell me." He drops his head, gently shaking it, "Even if you are. . Mine. . You need to go home."

I blink quickly as disappointment spreads through my body, "What?" He shakes his head slowly and looks up at me once more, "I can't offer you any kind of life, this" He motions toward all of Bobby's house. "This is what my lifestyle does to people."

I feel the anger slowly building in the pit of my stomach. I shake my head forcefully, not accepting his answer, "But it's still a better life than the one I have now!" Dean squints his eyes at me, "How? It's got to be better than this!"

My fists clench up at my sides as I yell, "No! It really isn't! The ONLY thing I lived for was my monthly visits to Bobby! He was the only person who understood what it's like! I have skills Dean, skills that I obviously got from you! Bobby was the only one who was there for me! And now he's DEAD!"

Dean retaliates by saying, "Well you've got to have adopted parents or something! Go back to them!" I am at yelling at full volume now, "WHY? Am I not good enough for you? Am I too much a liability? Or do I not have enough Winchester in me to be considered part of this family!?"

After a moment of silence I look at him angrily, "Why are you so against this?" He shakes his head, his voice barely coming above a whisper, "The same reason I couldn't stay with Ben."

I shake my head, "Who in the hell is Ben?" Dean shakes his head and Sam speaks up, "Dean stepped away from hunting for a while. During that year he got together with a woman, who had a kid and was going steady. He kid, Ben was his name, he thought of Dean as his father."

I hear Dean speak up, "Long story short, I loved them. I loved them both, but my lifestyle was going to end up getting them killed. So I had to leave, no matter how bad I wanted to stay." I wait as his reasoning sinks in, I try and understand and fail.

I shake my head, "I'm not them Dean. I'm YOUR daughter. I've grown up with hunting. I can protect myself." Dean shakes his head, "No you can't, and you're only eighteen!" I squared my shoulders, "You stayed with your Dad at eighteen, and you were raising Sam on top of all this."

Dean looked at me, and firmly said, "Yeah, well I had a screwed up childhood. I didn't have a choice. This is me giving you the only thing I can. A choice. Go have a life, fall in love, get married and have 2.5 kids and a house in a subdivision. That's what you deserve."

I cross my arms over my chest, "You've got to be kidding me." He looks at me confused, "What?" I throw my hands in the air, "I'm a Winchester, Dean! I don't want to fall in love and have babies! I want to know my father. I want to stand side by side with my father as I kill as many evil sons a' bitches as I can."

I walk closer to him, "Dean. I lived the first fourteen years of my life normally. I went to school, I got good grades, I did everything everyone else my age did and I felt alone in the world. The first time Bobby took me on a hunt, I felt free. I'm not normal, I will never be normal. I don't want normal, I don't need normal. This is what I'm good at, and I want to do it with you."

I watch as he processes what you had just said, and you thought you had gotten though his thick skull until he shook his head "No. I will not let you do this. I already feel guilty that Sammy was sucked into all this shit. I'll be damned if you're going to be sucked in too."

I tap my foot on the hardwood under me, "Dean, you've been damned for a while now. And I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to hunt. You wanna know why? Because APPARENTLY my Great-Grandfather was a Man of Letters, my grandfather and grandmother were both kick ass hunters, and my uncle and father are hunters AND Men of Letters. I want to continue the family business. I want to make you proud."