SAYA

CHAPTER 34

"This is my favourite flower, it's a 'Forget-Me-Not'. People thought and still think it is weird that I prefer it to a rose that is beautiful and elegant. It just has this aura that always seems to brighten up my day, that's why I'm happy it's growing nicely," Saya narrates as she kneels on the floor watering it. She looks up and sees Xerxes is not even paying attention, he's been spacing out since their encounter with Lady Oma.

Xerxes is sitting on the bench next to Saya who is kneeling, watering her plants.

What could Oma possibly have on Saya that can change her mood instantly? It's so annoying and frustrating when he's left in the dark. Should he threaten Nabir again? No, they are past that. Maybe Saya is still recovering and she's not used to Oma yet. It is true, he needs to take better care of the enemies he captured at the Battle of Laine. He has avoided going there for a bit, his anger management is still not getting any better. The worst part is gone, and Saya is okay, he should be focused on her and the baby. Although, the tales of their commander seriously injuring himself but not dying sounds mysterious.

Xerxes is pulled out of his thoughts when Saya walks past him heading to the castle. He stands up immediately, going after and catching up to her.

"What is it?"

He looks back at the garden and sees she is not done with transplanting. "Saya"

"It's nothing My Lord, I'll just do it with Peter tomorrow," she replies, not sparing him a glance. He frowns at her statement, "Why?"

"Like I said, nothing." They arrive inside the castle and Saya goes up to the third floor, but Xerxes grabs her, taking her up to his chambers. When they get there, Saya just stands there looking at him.

"Do you know the reason I do activities like this with Peter?"

Xerxes' frown deepens but says nothing, looking at her. "It's because he's active, he carries on conversation, you were spacing out the entire time, and it just felt dull and boring to me."

Did she just call him dull and boring?

"I'm not telling you to change because I love how you are, all I am saying is there are just some activities you cannot do with me because of your personality. I am not complaining at all, I just feel you should understand that, I still love you," so much it hurts that she's keeping a secret from him.

"I think you should leave these activities to your comrade," she finishes. Xerxes is just staring at her.

"Are you hiding something from me?" he asks, watching her carefully. Saya tries to maintain composure, she shakes her head.

"Before you went to Laine, you cried telling me that you really wanted to go. Those tears were fake," he tilts his head a bit to the side still watching her closely.

How did he know? And here she thought that he had fallen for it. Saya doesn't respond, avoiding his gaze.

"Saya"

"I want to go to my chambers," she says looking back at him. He calls her name again, reaching out but she steps back. "No, just let me go to my chambers."

Xerxes stares at her for a bit before he sighs going to his bed. Saya looks at him one last time before she heads to her room. She gets there shutting the door immediately, and collapsing on her bed.

"Why can't I just trust that he will not harm me?" she asks herself.
Maybe it's because the other time that happened it didn't end well. But that was a long time ago, before he had told her his secret, his past. It's just so scary for her, and she's really confused. After lying there for a few minutes, she gets up and starts making embroidery designs on her dress. She looks outside, she did stay in the garden for a few hours trying to see if he would stop spacing out. It's not her fault! No, it is.