Tenth Grade was Fun!

10. SNIVELLUS ISSUES

That evening I went home and started studying after freshening up since we were given our monthly test schedule that we were having all week, next week, that is, basically in two days, since it was Friday today.

In all honesty, I was finding difficulty in physics with the desert-dry topics which included rays from sunlight blah blah blah solar energy per unit area blah blah blah perpendicular to exposed atmosphere blah blah blah.

BLAH.

In this rate, I would be barely passing the physics test.

I DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND!!

But anyways I end up by-hearting majority of it without understanding them at all.

This was enough madness for today.

Setting my book on the table beside the couch, I rest my head on the back of the couch thinking about today's events.

Nikhil and I shared a kiss.

It was my first kiss. Probably Nikhil's too, unless he hid it from me.

After we had kissed I panicked and left him there, without looking back and haven't seen him ever since then.

Now that we kissed, sparks and tingles and all, do I...like him?

What about Ved then?

I haven't confessed about my feelings to him, but now that they seem to fade away, it isn't really necessary I guess.

What do I make out of Nikhil and me?

He's my best friend, good-looking too, no doubt in that—I'm his best friend, but not blind—and...we kissed.

So...I like him...?

But what if he just used the situation and kissed me at the spur of the moment, not really meaning to?

Or maybe because he just wanted to make me talk to him again by kissing me?

Are we not friends now?

I have so many doubts about so many things, but one thing I'm sure about is that I don't regret it.

I don't regret kissing him, I meant to do what I did and I'm glad that Nikhil was my first kiss.

And now, the one big question—what are we?

A mild headache forms and I rub my temples. My thoughts seem to be going nowhere other than giving me a headache.

Sighing, I check the time and go to check on my mom after deciding to have dinner.

"Ma, wanna have dinner now?"

"Sure, just arrange the dishes till I come, I'm on the phone." She replies and goes back to the phone call.

Just when I was through the threshold, I hear her whispering, "I'm not going to deprive her teenage life just because we're having financial problems...Look, we can manage, get a loan, but we must help Rithvika to become what she wants...Well, we already know she studies well, so she could get scholarship for her college...Fine! I'll talk to her. I'm going to have dinner, goodbye honey, love you."

She opens the door suddenly and looks at me surprised. Oops?

"How much of that did you hear?" She asks after recovering, with a passive expression.

"About letting me live my teenage life, our financial problems...trying to manage." I pause and then continue hurriedly, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hear it. It just happened, you don't have to talk about it to me, I get i—"