nat p.o.v
soooooooooo, today chloe and i are having my snake and her cat go on a lil date!! i got my snake a little dress for her to wear and a little pearl necklace. she is going to look so pretty! but i swear to god if chloe puts her cat in his stupid gangster costume for this date, i will chase her around the house with scissors again.
chloe p.o.v
for the date i wanna put emilio in a pimp costume because he is a pimp. he's my cat. he gets all the bitches. anyways nat said i have to put him in nice fancy cloths so i went out and bought him a wedding dress for their date, because cloths don't have a gender, my cat can wear whatever the fuck he wants. so he was in his dress looking like the most handsome boy he is. and he was off to his date. but i swear to god. if their fucking snake eats my cat. nat i'm comming for your dipper wearing ass.
nat p.o.v
we meet up at the island in the kitchen and i had set up a little "love shack" for them to have dinner at. chloe made little small pancakes for them to eat, and i had little knives and forks for them to use. we set them both on the island and we (chloe (｡-_-｡)) made sure that my snake wouldn't eat her cat. WITCH SHE WOULDN'T!!1!1 but whatever. then we left the kitchen.
Emilio p.o.v
i, the most handsomest boy have to be on a date with this stupid ugly ass snake. she isn't even saying anything to me. she just keeps sticking her tongue out and being a total creep. oh well. as long as my dress stays nice i don't really give a shit. i decided it could be best if i tried to make some small talk. "meow meow meow?". the bitch totally ignored me.
longview p.o.v
omg omg omg omg omg!!! he is soooo cute!!! god i could just stare at him all day long. his fur is so perfect, his eyes are green as grass, the way he wears a dress, oh he looks like a femboy. i want him to impregnate me. i- i wanna have his baby's!!!! "e-emilio-kun?" i stammerd out with a blush. "meow?" oh shit. i forgot... he's a cat. ughhhhh. "e-emilio-kun, i- i want to have your baby's, your kittens," i start to blush a darker shade of red. "meow." oh god he is so dreamy, they way he meows! *squeels* he is so purrftec. "emilio-kun" *blushes and bites bottom lip* "if that's a yes, then please fallow me up to them second floor" he is so charming!!! he takes me in his mouth and carries me up the stairs like a true gentleman \(//∇//)\
TIME SKIP: After whatever the hell happned
kara p.o.v
i was going to walk downstairs to go get some of the leftover mac n cheese that made me feel smarter when i saw kristine playing with emilio and longview. "hey kristine, what are you doing" "playing with the cat and snake, OH! do you know why there a bunch of cows outside?" she said standing up "i'm sorry, what? cows?" i was beyond confused "yeah the cat and snake were outside and there is like at least 7 cows out there" what the fuck.
Alex p.o.v
what they didn't know was that the cows are a spawn of the cat and the snake scoddly pooping. so they had children, and those children happned to be cows. "Umm guys this person is here again" nat called out to the others. "and they said that the cows came from longview and emilio" they added on. "and now they are narrating everything i am doing and saying." nat said while walking closer to the mysterious person. oh shit. THATS ME. well gotta go folks. sincerely your stalker that can break the fourth wall
nat p.o.v
"oh never mind they are gone now" that person is freaking weird. well shit. now chloe and i have to take care of these fucking cown. conveniently we live on a ranch. "CHLOE!!" she came outside. "yeah?" "we are doing a joint custody of the cows" i said with a smile on my face. "the fucking what?" "turn around dumb ass" she then turned around and saw a bunch of cows. "no way. cool! when did we get cows?" "they came from your cat who apparently had sex with longview." i said fixing my dipper. "WHAT?!?? NO, I CANT TAKE CARE OF KIDS, THAT LAST TIME I WAS TRUSTED WITH A CHILD I TOUGHT A THREE YEAR OLD HOW TO SAY FUCK, and another time i saw a kid shoving fingers up his butt and said "nice going kid", and then another time a kid sneezed on me and i dropped it!, i am unfit to be a parent!!1!1!1" (those are all true events that i (chloe) did) holy shit, i'm friends with an idiot. "well i want 90% custody over the cows" i said fixing my diaper again the damn thing just keeps falling off. "okay that's fine, but i might feed them only chicken nuggets and mac n cheese when they are with me.." "that's fine" and with that, we now have cows.
Alex p.o.v
okay i managed to sneak back in and as of right now annie and charity are ridding the cows, anna is milking one of them, well trying to, nat has their hand down their dipper doing god knows what, chloe is putting emilio into a ballerina tutu, aiden is on the dark wed seeing if he can buy pete wentz, kara is eating mac n cheese, and kristine is comming up behind me with a shovel. wait what? shit. i gotta run. "DAMN IT , they got away again" kristine said walking back to the cows.
