kokkun's stuff. read if you want to, or else don't.

i have more to say, beware.

so uhm
i remember i really have more to say but i've already forgotten rip
ah right
I was listening to two time by our Lord and savior jack stauber (I most definitely misspelled his nickname) and I realized, this thing could reach my old online friends (which I miss very much). so if you're reading this, hello, things changed haha~

you know when you like someone but oh right they're straight. and they know you like them. they don't care. now they like your friend and you ask if you can help them because... why are you doing this? you promised him you'd stay by his side in one way or another. now you're giving him advice on how to flirt. you lied to him, you're not over him, you idiot. you miss it when he was convinced you were a girl, and he liked you. but you ruined it. "I'm trans, if we're going to date, please see me as a guy. I couldn't stand it otherwise."
are you happy now?
you're not.
ah come on joji, not now with slow dancing in the dark. skip to the next track. ah, anathema? that's even worse, why do you hate me, spotify?
now you're aware of the fact that no one will ever like you for who you are. you're a trans guy, most guys are straight, you're a girl to them.
sempre la stessa solfa.
whatever.
I'm probably staying up late tonight, too. I never learn.
I know this is getting depressing as hell but hey, you saw that coming, don't complain.
"won't you go to someone else's head?"
"haven't you taken enough from me?"

so eating, huh?
I hate eating. I mean, I like food but I hate the act of taking food and shoving it inside your body to get either instant pleasure or long term guilt from overeating. also I'm pretty sure I look pathetic when I eat so I try not to. I like drinking though.

you know when you feel like anytime everyone could just disappear and someone you really admire could materialize in front of you so you feel like you have to be in perfect conditions anytime? yeah that's my life.

wow I'm texting the guy again, he's rambling about how he likes this other girl and she doesn't like him back and I'm there like "hah, samee"
no connor, not same, lame.

okay I'm going to sleep now.
no I'm not.
expect another update.

stay thrivin'.