to my lovely mai, you really were the only person who understood me. you tried your best and i appreciate the effort. you, my friend, changed me dearly. i can say that with fucking confidence. we met on mxmdiscord and became friends over eating bugs, during somewhat in may? might i add, may was the best month for all of us. it really was. im so glad we met, i think i would have lost it if it wasnt for you. it really is hard living, i always had this thing where i dealt with problems alone. i was taught that expressing negative emotions were always wrong, so i talked to myself and cried in my room till i felt better. i was so independent and depended on myself, that i really couldnt see through it. you showed me that i could be dependent on you and i really am glad i did.
being alone was something i always hated, so thank you for everything you have done for me ( from the morning messages to the goodnight messages ) they are probably one of my favorite things that come from waking up and going through with life haha. they really do motivate me throughout the day, that i have someone to tell about how my day went. im slightly ashamed to say this but, when it came to that one day. the day i totally lost it, i felt so sick of everything that i wrote everyone goodbye letters and felt so s7icid2l. im really sorry i gave up so easily, that i didnt try hard enough. i thought i gathered all my thoughts and that was the only conclusion to all my problems. you were the only person who ever asked me why i felt like that, why i wanna throw everything away. you talked me out of it all, at some point i could say you basically saved me from my selfish thoughts. i had such a trouble understanding myself, yet you showed me it was okay to express my emotions and depend on someone. sometimes you would tell me when i did something wrong but would never stop me from expressing how i felt, you were like a mother figure i wish i had in my life. one day ill go out to canada and we can meet, it would probably be the best moment in my life.
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LIFE OF A PARTY.
Randomyour the sun, you've never seen the night, but im not even a moon im not even a star. so lets be sincere. rants + letters © weataer