Fools. (Cressi/Lionaldo) (Cristiano Ronaldo/Lionel Messi)

Part Thirty Four.

To: Leo

I blocked him.. I told him not to contact me again... I did it for you.

To: Cristiano

Bravo 😒 do you want a cookie or something?

To: Leo

I don't get why your being so mean about it... I'm trying to fix this Leo, and I didn't mean what I said when I told you I hated you.

To: Cristiano

🍪

To: Leo

Leo Im so fucking sorry and im so confused and hurt and I dont know why you're BEING SO MEAN. I know youre stressed out from everything going on but that doesn't mean ill sit here and be your punching bag

To: Cristiano

IM NOT GOING TO COACH YOU THROUGH YOUR FEELINGS CRIS. You're a grown person, you can figure out how to feel and what to say.

*****

Cristiano was sitting in the bath tub, phone in hand and tears streaming down his face. He was frustrated, like truly frustrated and confused because he apparently kept saying and doing the wrong things and Leo wasn't helping him... it hurt, it made his chest feel heavy, he didn't know what he was doing wrong. He didn't know why he kept saying the wrong things...

He stared down at the keyboard, trying to figure out what to say next that wouldn't make Leo angry. He typed out a few things and quickly erased them, he was... scared because he didn't know if what he'd say would push Leo further away or not. He loved Leo, he loved him so much and he wished he could just SHOW Leo it. Everything was misunderstood through the phone, it was like all of his words came out wrong, everything he'd say was taken the WRONG way.

*****

To: Leo

Do you... Do you actually regret meeting me? Because that's okay if you do... It wont change how I feel about you.... If you do hate me, and if you really want to cut me from your life... That's okay too...

To: Cristiano

Cris.. What?

To: Leo

It's okay if you dont want me in your life anymore... Im giving you permission to cut me from your life again... You can block me again. You can cut me off from ever contacting you. We can go back to being strangers.. I think I can handle the heartbreak. Itll hurt a lot but if you really want me out of your life and if you believe your life will be better without me in it then thats okay. I love you enough to let you go.

To: Cristiano

You'd really do that...?

To: Leo

Yes.

*****

Cristiano waited for it, the text.. The "dont ever talk to me again" text, the "okay thanks, bye" text. Any text that hinted or confirmed that Leo didn't want him in his life. So to say he was shocked when he seen the call coming in, would be an understatement. He picked it up and put the phone up to his ear, the gut wrenching sobs that came through the phone were enough for Cris' heart to shatter as well.

"I'm so sorry Cris, I'm a terrible person and I'm SO SORRY!" Leo cried into the phone, Cris knew he must have been crying for a while, judging by how wrecked his voice sounded.

"Le-"

"You don't have to forgive me, you don't have to keep me in your life, but please just listen to me when I tell you I am so fucking sorry. I don't deserve you, I don't deserve Anto, I don't deserve ANYONE. You're all so good to me, you all forgive me over and over again and I do nothing but push you away. I overreact, I say the WORST things, I hurt you so many times Cris, why are you still here? Why do you stay with me? Why do you keep coming back to me? I don't deserve you, I wish you hated me Cris, I wish deep down that you'd just hate me," Leo was babbling now, words coming out loud but jumbled. Cristiano kept trying to interrupt him, but he wouldn't stop. 

"Leo sto-"

"I don't know what to do anymore Cris, I'm so pathetic, I'm so worthless. I'm just what those people say I am, I'm a joke. Overrated, overhyped, just a fucking loser."

"Stop saying that!" Cris pleaded, but Leo wouldn't stop crying. He was taking these short choppy breaths, his whimpers and whines making Cristiano wish he was there. He wished he could just hold Leo, tell him that he wasn't any of those things.

"Why can't you just hate me like everyone else Cris? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST HATE ME? I try SO HARD to push you away, I say the meanest things possible to just MAKE YOU HATE ME, but you never do. WHY?"

"Because I love you." The answer was obvious, and surprisingly Leo stopped his rambling... He was silent and Cristiano gulped, closing his eyes, trying to bite back his own sobs that threatened to escape. "I love you so much, I know you try over and over to push me away. I know you say the worst things and if you were anyone else, I'd probably hate you... But you're not, you're not like everyone else, you actually mean something to me. You grew on me like a flower does on a cactus, something that shouldn't be there, it's an unnatural pairing but it works because it's us. I love you Leo, and you confuse me sometimes and it's frustrating but I'll put up with it for forever if it means you're in my life."

"You... You really do love me, don't you?" Leo whispered and Cristiano nodded, it was a stupid action seeing as Leo couldn't actually see him.

"I do, I really do." Cristiano whispered back, not trusting his voice not crack if he spoke louder. For a moment, they both just listened to each other's breathing. Neither of them knowing what to say.

"I love you too, and I'm sorry." Cris barely heard him, his voice so quiet through the phone.

"I'm sorry too," He meant it, truly... They'd both made some serious mistakes...

"I guess we both have issues to work through," the chuckle sounded weak, like he was trying not to cry again. Cris frowned and nodded again, he hummed in acknowledgement. Leo sighed and Cris knew they had so much to discuss, so many issues that needed to be handled. "I... I think we need some time to fix ourselves, don't you think?"

"Like some time apart?" Cristiano felt an inkling of worry, not wanting to distance himself further from Leo.

"No, not really time apart just... Maybe we can keep our conversations light... Until we can handle the serious topics with clear heads..."

"Or we can just get deal with the problems now and get it over with-"

"Do you really want to have the conversation about Gio and Anto right now? Because that's a big topic that needs to be dealt with," Leo mumbled and Cris flinched, okay yeah... He didn't think they were ready for that yet.

"Yeah, I guess you're right..." He muttered, looking down at the bubbles in the water he was sitting in. "When should we talk about it?"

"When we're ready to... I think we'll both know."

"Okay," Cris frowned and sat back, resting his head on the edge of the tub so he was looking up at the ceiling.

"Okay."

*****

Serious relationship issues like this are SO hard to writeeeeeee I SWEAR cause I don't want it to be unrealistic lol in terms of fixing these issues yknow?

Also, like I've said before, idk how long I'm gonna keep this book going 😬 Don't get me wrong, I love this story and I love this pairing, but I don't want it to get repetitive.