Time can heal but this won't.

Before you go.

"So, where is he?"

Her eyes darken and he really doesn't want to listen to what his brain is screaming at him.

"Norman I..."

Tears appear on her green eyes.

. . .

His eyes open up. The first thing he distinguishes is a white ceiling. He notices that his body is on a resting position (almost as if he had just woken up) and decides to stay like that for a few minutes, trying to avoid the dizziness that he would surely have had otherwise. Instead, Norman decides to take a look at his surroundings by moving his head gently and the couple of beds beside him, the mahogany wood flooring,and the infantile drawings that are hanging on the milky white walls set all the alarms on his brain because, without knowing how, he's back at that place that still gives him nightmares almost two years later.

How is he back at Grace Field House?

Quickly, his brain gets out of the shock and starts reasoning as usual. He gets to the conclusion that he must be dreaming (at least until the place starts to turn into the night terrors he is used to). He sits down,grateful that he isn't experiencing any whirling sensation, and since he knows that none of what he is seeing is actually real, decides to let go a bit of his nerves, still paying attention to everything around him but with a more curious than afraid instinct. He starts to wander through the place. He can't say he hates it here, the house brings him fond moments that he refuses to see as lies. Still, he can no longer call it a home (even though he wishes he could). Staring at the old childish drawings that make him smile melancholic, the perfect made up beds that, in some bizarre way, he had missed and the "nut-brown" door, he sighs with a mixture of comfort and sadness, not knowing why he feels this way, and then decides to explore some more, maybe if this was one of those "lucid dreams" mama once told him about he could stop pretending for a bit (it had been so long since the last time he had the chance to do something so carefree).

He quickly finds himself in front of the library's door he has spent so many afternoons in. He can't say he was expecting something when he opened the door and that figure was so connected to the place that the few minutes he took to approach him, take a seat next to him and give a quick look at what the boy was reading were passed without him noticing what was actually happening.

The moment his brain finally realized the situation, he almost choked on his own breath and instinctively got a few inches away, his fight or flight reflexes as active as ever.

The other gave a little chuckle and looked at him, amused.

"Why so scared? Have you seen a ghost?" His eyes sparkled charmly "Or was it just your reflex? To be honest, I thought it was impossible for you to get paler, Nor-"

He can feel hot tears running through his face, he's probably ruining the other's shirt and the whole stoic facade he has been working so hard to perfect doesn't really matter anymore.

Ray's alive here and that's all that matters.

"Don't be stupid" He gives little rubs at his back, awkward to comfort but trying his best. "You know the truth"

"I don't really care" he buries his face in the other's shoulder "let me be like this for a bit more, please"

He hears a little hum as response, a hand patting his head while the gentle strokes on his back continue.

Feeling protected was something he had missed for so long without knowing. His heart wrenches, his mind keeps trying to make him accept the truth, but he doesn't want it right now. Norman feels tired, has been feeling that way for what seemed like an eternity (even though it had just been two years) Asking himself questions he couldn't really answer, taking a role no twelve year old should, doing things that he could say his body was in a better condition than his soul. Being able to finally be comforted was, to say the least, nice.

"Why did you do that?"

"Do what exactly?"

"You know what I'm talking about, idiot"

"And I'm pretty sure you still don't want to admit the answer, idiot"

His heart gets heavier with that sentence.

He remembers discovering Ray's secret place, where he had hidden all he would need for his plan to work out. At a quick glance and with the knowledge he had, it was easy to figure out what the boy had been planning for so long. He remembers how his own lips made a soft smile. He wouldn't let him die, that was for sure, if the dumbass wanted to die, he would make sure to show him a million reasons to live, each for whatever reason Ray had for desiring to end with his life.

He, for the first time, had encountered a problem he couldn't solve. It was Ray after all.

"Was there something I could have said to change your mind?"

"What kind of question is that?"

"If only I had-"

He feels the hug being broken and a hot sensation on his cheek. Those dark green eyes covered by tears as well.

"Stop right there, I thought you were a genius, Norman" He can't look at him anymore, his voice hurts too much already. "Not some stupid with a it-was-my-fault complex, don't you dare to think it was or else..."

"You were hurting and I couldn't do anything!" His throat hurts, and his eyes are swollen but he feels strong enough. "I can't even tell for how long you had been like that and I was supposed to be your best friend!"

He can't control anything, not even his body. He feels so useless, what type of friend he was? How could he be called a genius if he couldn't even discern how much Ray hated himself, to the point of...

"That's because you two made it all better" The tone sounds so soft and broken he is forced to look at his face. He is smiling. "All the moments I had with you and Emma were the best in my poor excuse of a life."

He's about to open his mouth, but decides to keep it shut instead. There is a soft smile on his lips even though tears keep running down. He wanted to ask more questions, he wanted to make him realize how wrong he was for wanting to go so soon, he wanted, he wanted...!

He wanted so many things...

"It's already too late" He's opening the library's door. "It was nice to see you again, Norman. Tell the other idiot it wasn't her fault either. She's starting to annoy my "Eternal rest" and I want to enjoy it, you know"

The room starts to fade out.

"I'm looking forward to meet you two again."

...

"I couldn't Norman I-" She starts sobbing uncontrollably and he waits for the worst. "He's gone."