How to fall in love with yourself

Introduction

The first step to falling in love with yourself starts with understanding what happiness is and how you can make yourself happy. When I was in secondary school, I did not understand the concept of happiness. I did not know how to be content with myself. For me, my joy only came from other things, like getting good grades. Do you see the problem with this kind of mentality? If you do not understand it, then I will explain why this was an unhealthy way of viewing happiness.

When I failed in an exam or simply did not get the grade that I wanted, I became severely unhappy. I criticised myself, cried, and I hated myself for it. Once I received the results that I wanted in school, I was elated temporarily, but as soon as I did not get what I wanted, I went back into a self-deprecating state. My unhealthy perception of happiness during my teenage years later exacerbated as I entered sixth form college.
By the end of year 13, in the sixth form, suicidal thoughts had entered my mind, and I did not know how to stop it. It almost felt like it was too late.

I spent so much time trying to get good grades to please my parents without even considering how it was affecting my mental health. Unfortunately, as I got older, the state of my mental health worsened because of other things that were happening in my life.

Now, as a 20-year old, I look back on all the things that I went through, and I realise that I NEED to love myself! I deserve to feel loved.
Once I realised this, I had to understand that happiness is about being at peace with myself, even if things are not going my way. You deserve to be happy, but you need to know that happiness has to come within yourself. Do not make the same mistake I did for years, relying on other things to make me feel happy because it won't help you.

Once I realised that I deserved happiness, I began to have hope. I hoped that I would get to a place where my depression and anxiety would not have a hold over me anymore. In the Bible, it discusses that God's hope can fill a person with joy and peace in (Romans 15:13)
"Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."
Having hope is so powerful because it can allow you to stay motivated.
My hope allowed me to take the steps I needed to improve my mental health. So let yourself be hopeful again. Trust and believe that you have the strength to fight your mental illness or simply that you deserve to be happy.

REMEMBER THAT YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY.