Love is a scary game.

Life is good.

15 :40 , that time of the day where everyone heads to the showground. Nah nothing is really happening , it's just a bunch of teenagers smoking weed , hubblies and some even smoke cigarettes. Parents have no idea what's happening at the showground. They just assume we're either playing netball , basket ball or watching as the players play. But what happens is , we get there , sit in groups , roll our blunts and all get high as fuck. We make friends too , meet new people and yeah sometimes we really do play sports. But rarely. But I do and alot. I love body fitness.
So my best friend and I get there at about 16 : 05 pm. There's already enough people and we normally don't buy our own weed because immediately when we get there , some boys who'd like to smoke with us call us over and we all hang out and smoke. One could ask me
" why do you smoke though? " to be honest I'm just the type to say " lol, Just for fun and I get bored at home cause I cant make friends!" But in reality , I think we all smoke because society is hard on us and that's what everyone else does. Smoking is that one hobby you have for relaxation , for you to laugh alot and avoid alot of things. Like if you're single and smoking , you not gonna stress much because everytime you leave the house you go smoke , nothing more or less. But in reality , for me? Smoking aint for fun. I started smoking in grade8 when I got depressed by a long distance relationship that took about 3 years and ended in bad terms. I don't know why but I love hard and hurt more when it goes south. My ex was emotionally unavailable at that moment , all he'd do was smoke weed and ignore me all the time. Until of course I figured
" If weed is what he uses to get over this feelings we have for each other than why shouldn't I because there's no point in loving someone who doesn't love you like you love them? " That's where I started. I smoke , depression went away because I'd laugh my ass out even at things that dont necessarily need too much laughing. But I loved it. I mean who doesn't love happiness? And despite that , weed , okay I , myself. I believe weed gets you exposed to alot about the world , yourself and people around you. Something like awkens your third eye. Especially if you love music or reading. Yep!

So yeah , my best friend usually doesn't answer that type'a questions or she just goes like "She's the one who taught me this smoking thingy." And it's true. I did but I won't blame myself for her being a weed addict because if she didn't want to , she wouldn't have continued. So the blunt goes around and trust me , no matter how much you love talking. The higher you get , the silent you get. You start talking to yourself and your body and mind relaxes so much you're likely to meditate without even realizing. After the second blunt , I usually visit the netball court and trust me once you're inside the match you're inside. And I get so annoyed when I'm now tired and my chest burns and they won't let me out of the match. But it's cool , we played netball and yeah that was a great funny match we played. I was in Joy's team. Joy is my friend , she loves netball with all her heart. After the match , my best friend approached me pointing at this other two guys but with her eyes lol. Ohhh , my crush , or ex crush but whatever him. My eyeballs popped out of my eyes. He looked back and I quickly looked down and at my best friend to tell her he's looking at me. We laughed in excitment and made our way out of the court. I was trying by all means to resist the urge to looking back at them. But I dont know why but we were heading home.
" wait why we going home though? I mean our crushes are here?" I asked my best friend , stopping her from taking further steps. We went back and chilled on the steps facing their directions as they started rolling their blunts. He caught me looking at him again. And oh before I forget. Last year I once told him I had a crush on him and he said he also has a crush on me and I was like
"pity you because I used to have a crush on you but not anymore."
We let that slide until this year I couldn't resist the crush anymore. He waved at us and I was looking at my best friend dead straight into the eyes and she was like "look who's waving at us!" I didn't look , I just laughed , avoiding them as hard as possible until my best friend was like "let's go" With those few steps we took to them I was curious asf. "Did they call us ,why are we going , what are we gonna say?" My best friend simply ignored me until we got to them. We greeted , me , with a huge smile. My best friend rarely smiles but they greeted back and asked if we minded joining them.  I dumbass nodded my head , my best friend pinched me and said "no lol , not at all!" A few seconds later I said my ouch because wow. The joint rounded in silence and awkwardness. Not knowing how to blow out the smoke because my crush was kinda checking my lips out and I acted like I'm not seeing anything but looking at the other way. But thinking about him , like how I keep playing hard to get even if its over a year now. They offered to take us home and we walked in two's. I honestly wasn't sure what to say but he was doing the questioning. I lied on most of the questions and started asking him questions too. Like why are you single and how I don't believe him. He told me something about being scared of girls and avoiding stress and heartbreak. And so I'm like " what makes you think I'd bring different , if you claim that's what girls come with?" He told me I'm different and just his type. To be honest , my gut is in doubt , but I was just like "okay and hell yes I'm different!"  I gave him my number and he immediately text me so I could save his when I get home. We hugged and parted. I told my best friend all about it and how weird I feel about it. I felt like he's a strange dude who's lying his ass out. My best friend convinced me I'm just overreacting , as always but this. Nah man , I was being scared.

When I got home , I took my time before texting back , but I finally did. Things were normal over the phone. No side or scary feelings , just flirting and smiling. We talked about music because I know one way to keep a nigga interested is to talk about what he enjoys. So yep , he dedicated a song to me and so did I. I sent it , easy by Danileigh and Chris Brown. It was currently my favourite song and said something about vibing and having no need to make anything official. That's really what I wanted, a no strings attached type'a relationship because well , I don't know really but yep that's what I suggested. We stayed up till late getting to know each other and yeah I guess we were getting somewhere. He asked if we could meet tomorrow and I was like " yeah cool."