state of grace // n.h a.u

part one

In a perfect world, Haley has back-to-back, sold-out shows at O2 Arena and her beloved fans scream the lyrics back to her with such force she's moved to tears someone could like and appreciate something she's produced that much. She would be decked out in a luxury brand she endorses regularly on her social media, like Gucci or Chanel, and have a team of makeup artists and hairstylists backstage waiting for the touch up as she runs off stage before the encore. Maybe she will even have a boyfriend who loves her for who she is and understands her desires for the future—someone to support her every move and be the shoulder to cry on she will so desperately need when times get rough.

But perfect the world is not.

Instead of back-to-back, sold-out shows at O2 Arena, she's got the 8pm time slot at Oasis Lounge every Friday night, and instead of fans screaming her lyrics back at her, she's barely even got the attention of all the men seeking a beer at the end of the workweek. Her outfit consists of a dress she found on clearance at Zara and a denim jacket she managed to find at a charity shop back home in Leeds. As for a boyfriend, well... Her year-long relationship with a man she thought could be the one ended merely five weeks before, and based off what she's stalked on social media, he seems to now be pretty damn cosy with his so-called best friend.

As Haley sings the final words of an Amy Winehouse tune, she hopes someone from the crowd will pull her away and grant her every wish she's ever dreamed of, but sadly it doesn't happen. Instead, a drunk man to the left wolf whistles at her, leaving the hair on the back of her neck to stand on end. She hates the way she forces a polite smile in his direction, but in her mind, it's the only way she'll be able to afford a decent tip from someone.

"I've got two songs left," she says as the song finishes, grabbing the bottle of water beside her and taking a swig. "Has anyone got any special requests?"

As she looks out into the buzzing crowd, no one bats an eyelid, and she sighs to herself knowing these people really don't give two shits about her. Funny how they thought otherwise the week before when she wore a low cut shirt and a padded bra.

Suddenly, from the back of the room, someone shouts, "Know any Fleetwood Mac?!"

Haley almost doesn't hear it at first amongst all the chatter, but she spots a figure in the back waving his arms and realises she isn't hearing things. "I do!" she exclaims excitedly, sitting her guitar back on her lap and she plucks a couple of strings to make sure she's got the right keys. "Think you'll enjoy this one."

A shout of glee comes from the back, which makes Haley smile as she begins to strum the opening chords to "Go Your Own Way." It's always a crowd-pleaser, and she may even have decided to play it herself if no one had made any suggestions, but she always tries her best to engage the audience whenever she can. The idea of including them in her set and feeling like they have some kind of say is something she really strives to achieve.

As Haley loses herself in the music, strumming along to the guitar and singing her heart out into the mic, she remembers why she chooses to sing in the first place. It's freeing—an escape from the real world, she likes to believe. No matter what she is going through in her personal life, no matter what is on her mind, she will always have music to fall back on and to make her feel something even when she's not sure she will ever feel again.

The Fleetwood Mac tune comes to an end, though Haley notices the extra loud cheers coming from the back of the room where the initial request had come from earlier. In light of this, she decides to dedicate her final song for the evening to the gentleman in the back who has helped put a smile on her face when she needed it the most. Again, as the song comes to an end, Haley hears the same familiar cheers and wolf whistles from the back.