The Woman With The Headscarf

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Her mother brought all her meals up to her room for that week and as for her father, he didn't come up to her room but on some nights, Lamees would catch his shadow out in the hallway, shuffling outside her door, unsure on whether to enter or no. He never came in.

But at least he was concerned, Lamees comforted herself with that. How could she possibly look at him again? After all he found out about her and all that she'd been hiding from them.

She wished she could just die in her room, alone in her shame.

She had told her mother everything, talking for hours some nights and others, not even a single word was uttered but both silently cried together, holding onto one another.

"So it waz dat same boy? De one in... ze car years ago?"

Lamees nodded. "Yeah, it's the same boy. But we never did anything after that... well, you know. We were both too scared and unsure afterwards but we still spent time and..." Tears started to build up in her eyes once again, as she recalled the times she'd spent with Gunner. "And it's just hard not to love him."

Her mom squeezed her hand tightly, her eyes softening at her daughter's burden and pain.

"And I love him so much. I love him in all the ways that I'm not supposed to."

Her mother's hand was unwavering as she held on, blinking down as many tears as her daughter shed. "Oh, Lameez," she wheezed out softly, "I wish I could take your pain an' turn it into mine. It breaks my heart too, to see yours breaking."

And then on the eighth night, instead of bringing in the dinner tray like she always did, her mother brought in her husband, who instead of staring at the floor, was finally looking look at Lamees, but with tears in his eyes. Without a word, he flew to her and hugged her so tightly and unexpectedly that Lamees was startled speechless.

At his warm embrace, she felt herself like a small girl again, who'd run into the arms of her father every time a kid looked at her in a mean way at the playground. She couldn't keep the tears at bay much longer and the first thing her dad did after the hug, was apologize. He was sorry for not being around and for not coming sooner.

"I just..." He paused, finding difficulty in expressing his emotions to his precious daughter. He glanced at his wife for support, who came over with a smile on her face and joined him on Lamees's bed.

He started again. "I just... had a lot to process. Because there was so much information that your mother was telling me and it was hard to believe all at once that... that you'd kept so much from us. I just had a harder time digesting all of that, than your mother. And this is not an excuse, but I'm ashamed of it regardless. Because while it was hard for me to believe everything all at once, it was also you who —"

He paused again, lowering his eyes and his wife gently weaved her fingers through his, urging him to continue and reminding him of her comfort.

"It was you who went through all of that, all of the trauma, the pain and the loneliness. And I feel that I haven't done my job as a father in p-protecting you."

He covered his face with his free hand and Lamees's mother reassuringly squeezed his other.

"Dad... no. It's not your fault." She didn't want to see her dad cry like this; she'd never seen him cry like this. "Please don't feel like this. You did everything right."

"No, I didn't!" He cried out, face still tucked away. "I didn't do everything right because I only taught you to lie and hide things. I should've taught you better, I should've trusted you more, I should've understood better. Then maybe, you'd feel like you could trust your parents with your pain. Then maybe... you'd feel safe enough to share things with us instead of fearing us."

In hindsight, these were all valid claims and it all made sense but at that moment, Lamees couldn't stand to see her parents feel so low about themselves and she kept denying what her father said in order to make him feel better, to make him feel like he hadn't failed as a parent. To make him look at her in the eyes again and not away from her like he was ashamed to see himself in her eyes.

To her, it was all forgiven. No grudges were held because she loved them both so much and she knew that they did too and that they were only doing what they thought was best for her.

Her father eventually managed to calm down and apologized to her again, reminding her that it wasn't her fault, none of it was. He said that he remembered Gunner from all those years ago and how despite how livid he had been at the time, he still appreciated the boy's good looks.

"If anything," he said to her, sniffing as he dried his tears, "you get it from your mama. She had a real knack for getting those boys' attentions. And unlike you, she wasn't subtle about it neither."

"Hey!" Her mother exclaimed, visibly offended. "So you throw me under de bus, huh?"

Her father shrugged innocently, his smile only widening at seeing Lamees trying not to laugh out loud. "To be fair, I'm not saying anything that isn't true."

"Yeah, well, I should've just run off wiz one of those boys an' not settle for you," she responded crossly, trying to pull her hand away from her husband's grasp but he didn't let go, as he pulled her in close for a hug and whispered in his beloved's ear, "Sweetie, you know I adore you. I was just messing around."

His wife visibly softened as she stopped trying to get away from him and leaned into him. "I know but don't push me, okay? Otherwise I will go an' mess around wiz someone else," she threatened, causing both father and daughter to giggle.

They all climbed downstairs together and Lamees sat at the table after 8 whole days, and shared a big bowl of chocolate fudge ice cream with her parents, despite it being 1 am in the morning. She felt at ease and much better than she had in a long time as she sat there and talked and joked with her family. Life, it seemed, was slowly starting to fall back into it's place again.