Kio Cyr Imagines

Hold On

A/n: TW!!! Please read this! I know this is a touchy subject so if you can't deal with sewer side and self harm, please don't read this chapter! I was just listening to sad songs and this came into my head, I'm sorry if anyone is sensitive to this.

Y/n POV
I'm sitting in my room with Kio next to me. As I scroll through some of his newer tiktoks that we made together and smile. When I go to check the comments my heart shatters:

User385479: ew, olive oil was better than this girl
User833630: Kio seriously downgraded... from Olivia to this smh
User754731: didn't come here to see her
User953736: ngl she kinda ugly :/

Do people really feel this way? I think about everything, kios ex was probably prettier than me. Maybe I am ugly. I sit in silence as the tiktok plays over and over in the background while I scroll through the comments.
I had been dealing with my, well, feelings, for a while now. People had been saying a lot of stuff like this on my videos too. I couldn't smile like I used to. Most times it felt fake, like a mask I put on for the rest of the world to hide my pain. I would tell myself that a famous tiktoker shouldn't have depression, my life is perfect. I knew that's what everyone would say anyways.
"You good?" Kio asks after hearing the sound play continuously.
"Yeah, I'm gonna take a shower though," I respond, getting up.
"Okay I'll order food," Kio says, walking out.
"Kio?" I stop him
"Yea?"
"I love you," I go up to him and kiss him.
"I love you too baby."
I go to my bathroom and start the shower. I used to just cry, but recently everything's gotten worse. I started hurting myself. I would cut my upper thigh with a pair of scissors in my bathroom. Bottling up my emotions wasn't good for me, but I still didn't talk to anyone. As I look in the mirror before getting in I hate what I see. I felt fat, my nose was too big, my hair was messy, I felt ugly. (Btw you are so gorgeous please don't ever doubt yourself!). I step in the shower and feel the warm water on my back. I put the scissors on the counter and just sit under the water, not having to energy you do anything. I can't get the comments out of my head. God, why do people hate me. What did I do to them!? I'm just trying to live. Is that what's wrong. What the hell, nobody would give a fuck if I died, they made that clear.
Full of rage and sadness I grab the scissors and furiously slice at my wrist. It stings and blood runs down my arms. I just keep going, each cut getting a little deeper until I feel weak. I think, this is it. I hope those people are happy. Things get blurry and I think of Kio. Shit. What did I do. I can hardly move and the bottom of the shower is almost completely red. Then everything goes black.

Kios POV
Our food finally got delivered and i go to get y/n. I knock on her bathroom door pretty soft. No answer.
"Y/n!" I call. No answer. Maybe she didn't hear me? "Y/N!" I call louder. She still doesn't say anything. I start knocking hard. She's definitely still in there, I hear the water running. I try to open the door but it's locked. I start to panic and yell her name continuously while shoving myself against the door. I force all my weight on the door and it swings open. I run and pull back the shower curtain. There sits y/n. She's not moving and there are deep gashes in her arms and old cuts and scars on her thighs. How did I not see it!? I pull her out and hold her in my arms. She is hardly breathing. Her blood drips all over my clothes but I don't care. I take off my shirt and wrap it around her wounds to help stop the bleeding. I call 911.

"Hello? Please help me, my girlfriend... she cut her... I- I was- please she's barely breathing!" I try to explain to the officer. I give her our address and she says help is on the way. She stays on the phone, but I direct my focus to y/n.
"Baby, can you hear me?" I ask her softly, "I love you so much, please don't give up! You are so strong and I know you can make it! Please try! We can get through this together! I love you y/n! You are my everything, please don't leave me!" I sob. I hear sirens and rush to the door so that I don't have to leave her for long. Paramedics rush in and carefully put her on a cot. I ride with her to the hospital, and she is rushed to an emergency room. I am left waiting for hours. I even fall asleep there, but I refused to leave. I call all the guys and they rush over. It's clear they were crying too.

Y/n POV
I can barely open my eyes. Everything is foggy and I can hardly move. As my eyes slowly adjust I see Kio standing over me, holding my hand. He smiles faintly as I open my eyes.
"Kio," I manage to say.
"Oh y/n, thank god. I thought you were..." he stops and frowns, "why baby?"
"I- where's my phone?" I say, trying to sit up.
"No, no, no, lay down I'll get it," he hands it to me and I show him his tiktoks and the comments and then some of the comments on my own. I can see tears in his eyes.
"I'm sorry, I should've seen, i should've known and helped and then you wouldn't be here," he says sadly.
"Hey, don't blame yourself, you saved me," i reassure him.
"I love you y/n"
"I love you too"

***Time Skip***

It's been about a month and I'm finally being released from the hospital. I have to go to therapy for a long time now. I guess I could use the help, but now there will be rumors all over social media. Kio and the rest of the guys had talked about it and told people to back off. I should have just told him in the first place. I'm finally feeling better, thanks to Kio. He's the best thing in my life.

A/n: again, sorry this one was on such a touchy subject. Also, please think of what you say about people online and please never try to hurt yourself. I promise you are worth so much more than you can imagine. You are loved and you would be missed. Ily 😘💖
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