Lies #4: Victim

Chapter 5

Six months later, Roman had become the master of Remus's emotions. It was strange to realize just how well he knew his brother, even before he started paying attention to his mannerisms. He's a crybaby- it's so easy to upset him! Every day, Roman would find more ways to hurt Remus, and every single thing worked. He felt like he held all the power, all the cards were in his hand. Maybe this isn't so bad. If this is what it'll be like for the rest of our lives, I'm more than okay with that. Their parents had even commented on how well he was behaving; they didn't know about what he was doing to Remus, but the happiness he got from it had almost if not completely dispelled his angry outbursts. I don't need to yell at Remus anymore- I can do something better!

On the Sunday night that was the last of the turning points, Roman and Remus were in their room getting ready for bed. Roman was pulling on a white T-shirt, while Remus was lying on his top bunk in only shorts on, his chest bare. Checking in the mirror to make sure he looked fine for his beauty sleep, Roman peered over at Remus. "Have fun getting a date for the dance next week with that stomach. I'm sure it'll be quite the challenge, but remember; the journey is more important than the destination."

Before Roman could even register what was happening, Remus leaped off the bed and smashed him against the wall, his hands gripping Roman's shirt. He giggled, "I don't need to convince anyone other than you. Since we're brothers and we love each other, we should go to the dance together! Probably should start acting the part." Leaning forward, Remus licked at Roman's neck. Before the situation could continue, though, Roman kicked at Remus's knee, sending him tumbling into the bed. "Get off me, you freak!" Roman was breathing heavily, fear spiking through his very being. He just did that. He fucking licked me! Isn't that something partners do? Jesus Christ superstar, that's incest! "Don't come near me! If you come any closer, I'll hurt you!"

"You can't hurt me anymore," Remus tutted, getting back up and grinning. "I am a freak, and for the longest time I hated it. But y'know, now I realize that's never going to change. So, why not just accept it and love myself? I mean, if you came to love your selfish, egotistical, bratty self, why can't I love my own broken soul?"

Roman didn't know how to respond. This... this couldn't be happening. Dr. Picani had never said this could happen, only that if Roman was mean to Remus that he would feel better about himself. He'd never said that Roman could actually drive him insane! This wasn't supposed to happen! I'm the one in control! But he was trembling, and he couldn't speak. Remus was absolutely terrifying. He doesn't have any moral boundaries... I bet he'd even rape me right here and right now! What was he supposed to do? Finally, he managed to open his mouth and choke out, "You're insane."

"You're darn right I am!" Remus laughed. "Hmm, I love this playful banter. Masks the tension of longing between us~"

"Shut the fuck up!" Roman wanted to escape his own skin. He didn't want to be here, to be having this conversation. Where could he escape too, though? The living room- I'll sleep out there tonight. "There is nothing between us. You're sick! Leave it to you to be into incest. You need some serious help. I'm not dealing with this anymore- I'm going to the living room." Snatching the blanket off of his bed, Roman darted out of the room and slammed the door behind him, running downstairs and collapsing on the couch. After a minute of silent contemplation in the dark, he began to sob quietly.

This was all of his fault. It was obvious that six months of saying terrible, terrible things had broken Remus even more than before. I made him this way- I made him come to the conclusion that he just needed to accept that he was everything that I said he was. All the things that Roman had whispered in Remus's ear, all the things he'd snidely remarked about- they were now flooding back into his head, each one a needle picking at his brain until he wanted to claw his own eyes out to spare himself the sight of those memories. Tears leaked out from between his fingers and dripped onto the soft couch cushion beneath him. He wiped away at the spot Remus had licked, cringing with disgust at the now-damp spot on his sleeve. He wanted to chop off that piece of skin, so the echo of the feeling of Remus's tongue would be gone. No, that would be too obvious to Mom and Dad... I might really hurt myself if I try that, too.