Wolf star

6 1 0

by iii_daisy

by iii_daisy

''I luv you'' Shouted a drunken Sirius at Slughorns party.

''You're drunk, you don't mean that'' I sighed, it hurt me. I wanted to shout I love you back but i was scared, scared that after his hangover he would regret it and are friendship would full to pieces.

''No am not'' replied Sirius dribbling.

''Are so, I am not one to be wanted. And besides, you're not gay.''I called back. Trying to sound strong, deep inside i was hurting but I didn't want Sirius to see. I didn't want my feelings to be layed out in front of him.

Sirius moved closer to me. Looking with his big eyes deep into my soul making my heart pounce. Grabbing my cheek with his smooth hands and kissed me. In front of everyone.

SIRIUS BLACK JUST KISSED ME ... ME!!!! I couldn't think, a million thoughts was processing inside my head.

''Gay enough for ya'' Winked Sirius. Still just inches away from my face. I didn't know what to reply with.

I felt everyone staring at me ... at us. I felt so many emotions.

''Sirius-'' I tried to speak

''I love you Remus John lupin. Always have. I just had to get into this state to admit it.''

''Admit it-?'' I felt a huge lump appear in my throat was he ashamed of me, and my furrie little secrete..

''Remus I didn't mean it like that -

''Am I an embarrassment to you IS IT BECAUSE OF THAT-'' I screamed. Loosing my temper I wanted him for so long, but I didn't want to be his shame, his guilt.

''Remus darling not that, never that its-''

''Its what Sirius, Spit it out. In front of everyone here go on.''

''Remus, we kissed only 40 seconds ago and you're picking fights already. Why can't you accept that I love you. Why can't you accept that I only got drunk because I was so scared of rejection from you. Why won't you accept this .. us. Forget it. forget this. It was a drunken mistake.'' Sirius for that moment seemed to be awoken, emotional and he looked hurt.

''A mistake, is that all I am'' tears washing down my pale face.

''Goodnight Mooney'' Sirius stood up and walked away. I saw James and Lily standing there shocked.

''Oh deer'' Sneered James as he ran after him.

All eyes where on me. I didn't know what to do. Or where to go from here.

''Oh Remus'' Cried Lily. She looked as dissapointed as I was.

''Scram all of you, the party over.'' Shouted lily.