Eternity

1.

I awoke with the coastal sun shining right through my window, the smell of the surrounding ocean mixed with the rich food sold to sailors at the docks. This is what I remember most about being home.

It was the first time in five years I had been home to Dakragh, where I was next in line to the throne. I had spent the past year in ‘mourning’ alone in Fargrazia palace with my few servants, my son and occasionally my brother.

But that was in Marridia where I was now Queen Regent thanks to the death of my late husband. Marridia was a hovel compared to Dakragh, Marridia famous for its farming and religious relics whereas Dakragh was infamous for its extravagance and lack of morals among the nobles.

The year of mourning was probably the best time that I spent in Marridia, I was alone with my son and was able to see my lover Cesare on a regular basis. He was my husband’s bastard son. Cesare is the most magnificent man you could lay your eyes on, with his rich black hair, luscious lips, intense black eyes and rugged jaw line covered in light stubble.

I had left him in Marridia when we travelled to Dakragh just a week ago. Luca came running into my room, breaking my train of thought, but every time I look at Luca I am reminded of Cesare.

My son and I arrived home in the middle of the night, there was no welcoming party, except for a few servants who were still awake cleaning.

Our belongings had still not been unpacked. I rummaged through our luggage before I dressed myself and Luca, here at home father likes to keep a private life so he only has his personal staff here.

We made our way downstairs into the dining hall with rich tapestries hanging from the walls depicting the past events of Dakragh. Here my Father and older illegitimate brother were awaiting us for breakfast.

My father a skinny yet tall man with grey hair stood up at the end of the lengthy table, motioning for and embrace from me and my son, whom he had never met before. Luca stood still as my father squeezed him, uncomfortable in his presence as are most people.

My brother Rodrigo however was tall and beefy and had come to visit me in Marridia many times. I hugged Rodrigo as he whispered in my ear ‘Catalina, it’s wonderful to have you home…finally.’ I nodded as my eyes began to well up.

We sat down at the table filled with fruits and pastries and ate in silence. My father was a horrible man, who seemed to look frailer then I remember; when Rodrigo would visit us he told stories of the awful things he did to his people, like gouging a mans eye out for having an affair, even though my father is infamous for being a playboy.

After breakfast I took Luca on a tour of the castle, showing him the vast kitchens filled with chefs cooking delicacies, the libraries, the halls filled with hundreds of paintings of my ancestors and of course the grand hall which my father had dedicated to himself. At the end of the great hall were two paths, one the west wing, the other the east leading towards our rooms.

Luca began to run through the west wing of the castle, where the paintings became scarce along with the warmth and light due to the lack of windows in the stone walls, I chased after him I would not let him see what was at the end of the west wing. He was not ready for that.

My mother.

My Mother was once the most beautiful woman in all of Dakragh, but many years ago my mother was in an accident, the details have never been disclosed to me, all I know is that my brother is responsible for her still being alive.

She spent the rest of her life lying in that bed that she lays in now. Father despises her since the church denied his claims for divorce.

When I caught up to Luca, Rodrigo was holding his hand taking him back. I looked him in the eyes and he at mine from this I could tell Rodrigo was visiting my mother. After the incident the two grew closer even though she was the woman that got his mother sent away from court , they had this bond that was unbreakable. 

I sat down beside her and she smiled with the side of her face that was still beautiful. She began to cry. ‘You are so beautiful; don’t let your father take that away from you like he did to me.’

‘What do you mean by that mother.’ I asked confused.

‘It means nothing, all that matters is that you are finally back beside me.’

Tears where now rushing down my face as well as my mothers. I held her hands as we cried. We continued talking about my life overseas and did so for sometime. The door creaked behind me. I turned around to see my father staring at my mother in disgust as he dragged me away from her.

I squirmed while in my fathers grasp, I easily broke free considering my father was growing old. Father exclaimed ‘I will marry you off again; I can’t bear to have you here reminding me of my wife that I lost.’

Mother began to wail with grief. Father slapped me. As I stared at him shocked that he would lay a hand on his own daughter; he dragged me out of her chambers and into the dark, gloomy, deserted hall while locking her door.

He sternly said to me ‘I am holding a ball tonight, to welcome you home. But I will find you a new husband and send you away again’. He walked away from me.

‘You can’t blame your problems on me, and solve them by sending me away.’ I yelled out to him.

My father turned around. ‘Do you not see what I am doing for you, if I marry you off to kings and princes and you bear their children, you will become the most powerful woman in all the lands.'

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Photo on the side is of Camilla Belle who I see as Catalina.