unlocked // hwang hyunjin

one

trigger warning! : violence, domestic abuse

if these topics make you feel uneasy please do not read this or ready with caution.

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hwang jiyoon's point of view

last winter

my usually lightly tanned face becomes paper pale as a vile taste boils up in my mouth, and vomit exits my sore esophagus.

 i fall into the snow covering the side of the curb. he picks me up by my arm again and slaps me, leaving the imprint of his hand in a pink tone along my jawline. i step backward while holding my face. i tried to hold in my crying and sobs, causing my body to convulse everytime i tried to hold in another weep. 

he walks closer to me.

"dad!" i shriek, as he grabbed me by the throat and tossed me onto the curb again, my head slamming against a chunk of ice, and my hair getting caught in my vomit. I attempt to scream out for help, while trying the get up, but i can feel my brain vibrate against my skull, the reaction to my head coming late. 

before i pass out, my father looks down on me and spits beside me. he walks away and leaves me helpless and bloodied on the curb of the empty street, and it's the last time i ever see him.

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current day

"good morning, jiyoon-ah" says ms. ko, a nurse at the hospital i have been staying at since last winter. she came in with a rack of what seemed to be medicines. it has been a year since the occurrence with my father, and unfortunately that was the last and only memory i had of my past. after passing out when my head went crashing into the piece of ice, i got a concussion which eventually turned into a 8 month long coma. apparently someone had found me and quickly called an ambulance. 

at first, I was registered a jane doe, meaning someone with no identity, because my shitty father refused to take authority of me or come forward and claim me as his daughter to provide my information proving my identity. i had forgotten his name and my own, so i couldn't help myself even if i wanted to, there was no way for me to find out my actual name or who i was before.

eventually, i became close to my nurses and caretakers and they gave me ideas for names i could use. i opted with hwang jiyoon because my main doctor, hwang joohyung, was almost a father figure to me. he treated me like his own child and did very well with my cerebral surgery. 

"ah, hello ms. ko, did my prescriptions change today?" i ask pointing at the rack full of medicine and pills. 

"yes, they did" she says, " but the good news is that they're less than you had to take before, about 4 less prescriptions, meaning you only have to take 3." ms. ko smiles as she places the medications into a napkin and passes it to me while pouring me a small cup of water." 

"ms. ko?" i ask, "i was just beginning to feel curious...how much longer will i have to stay here? to be honest i feel like i'm becoming a burden since i've been here so long." i feel nervous after asking and ms. ko looks at me with a dissatisfied look on her face.

"jiyoon-ah, you've only been awake from your coma for five  months, yet we have gotten to know you very well. we can tell your personality is the same as it was before you lost your memories through some of our testing. we love you here, jiyoon, and we want to make sure you're at your absolute healthiest when we send you back out to the outside world." she explains. her dark eyebrows furrow in concern, expressing her genuine care. i look down in my lap and take the first pill quickly, then look back up at her.

"ms. ko...i-i'm just worried about what i'll do afterwards... how can i pay the hospital and healthcare costs? my own father abandoned me and i can't remember a thing about my mother. how will i afford all of this?" i put the palm of my hand to my forehead, the stress of it giving me a headache. "i'm only 18 and i don't even know if i have money to my name and i will never find out if no one comes to find me." 

"jiyoon, please. don't worry about that right now. you never know what could happen, so please don't think so negatively." ms. ko says with a stern tone. i nod my head yes, and proceed to take the rest of the pills. ms. ko wearing, her baby pink scrubs and white sneakers, takes the cup from me when i finish, places it back on the rack and strolls out of the room after giving me a pleasant smile in which i returned.

about an hour later, after watching a few m-net performances on the TV those being a few k-pop groups i don't really know or remember knowing, called ateez, seventeen, and stray kids; eating some hospital jello, and sketching out some flowers on the sketchpad that another nurse named mr. jeong, had purchased for me, it was time for my psychological examination with dr. hwang. 

i found dr. hwang to be a very fascinating man, he was a brain surgeon and a psychologist. he always loved to tell me he wanted me to meet his family but i had never gotten the chance. 

as i walk into the examination room, i sit into the lavender colored couch and play with the play-dough clay that dr. hwang keeps at the small coffee table in the room for while his patients wait for him. dr. hwang enters the room with a wide smile on his face. 

"jiyoon-ah!" he exclaims. "how are you doing today?"

"i'm doing well, i guess, not much."  though i don't say much, feel very happy to see him.

"not much? hmmm... i don't think so. i saw  you watching m-net!" he smiles widely, and i smile back.

"what groups performed today?" he asks.

"i don't exactly know them but there was one called ateez, they were very energetic, i liked them a lot." i state. 

"hmm, i see. did you hear of a group called stray kids? my son really likes them." he asks, with a mischievous smile upon his lips .

"oh yeah! i almost forgot about them! i really liked their performance. but i don't know much about them.." i respond.

"okay then, i see." he had a grin on his face, as though there were something he had wanted to tell her but I decided to ignore it and get on with the session. we went along with our session as we usually would. dr. hwang gave me the good news that i was doing better mentally. before we ended the meeting he walked up to me and brushed my dark black hair out of my face and slightly lifted the bandage wrapped around my head to check my stitches from the surgery i had gotten.

"it's looking good, i think you can go out with a guardian now, jiyoon-ah." dr. hwang states.

i feel relieved by the news, but then another feeling of gut-wrenching sadness bursts in my chest... i have no family or friends nor a guardian. i decide to voice this thought. "dr. hwang... i have no guardian to go out with even if i wanted to, i don't have a family." 

"well..." dr. hwang begins,

"would you like to be apart of mine?"