Author's Note - bad language ahead sorry - inspired by picture
"Look, Will, if you have a problem with me, or whatever, just fucking tell me what it is," I snap down the phone, unable to control the anger burning inside me. "Don't treat me like this."
"I never see you anymore, Christina. You... you haven't acted like the girl I fell in love with for ages," I can tell by Will's voice that he's annoyed, and is trying not to yell.
"What, so you don't love me anymore?" I'm almost screaming as I get into my car, turning the engine on. "Is that what you're trying to tell me?"
"Wow, Christina. I can't believe you just said that to me."
"See, you're not even trying to deny it. No wonder you were flirting with that girl." my voice quietens, and I can feel a lump starting to form in my throat.
"Jesus, is that what all of this is about? How many times do I have to tell you, she's just a friend, I wasn't flirting!" he is yelling now, sounding as angry as I feel, maybe more so.
"I don't blame you, Will. She's prettier than me, she's probably better than me in so many other ways... I can see why you'd want her instead of me." I can't control myself then, and a sudden sob escapes from me, and I have to cover my mouth to stop him from hearing it.
"For fuck's sake, Christina... it's really hard to love you sometimes. You make yourself so fucking hard to live with."
I'm driving now, and tears are streaming down my cheeks, and I have to try to hide it in my voice.
"Then why don't you just leave me?" I cry, my vision starting to blur, the sobs becoming uncontrollable now. "You obviously want to. You can just go and be happy with someone else, you're clearly not happy with me."
"Jesus, don't you trust me anymore...?" he's quiet now, but for Will, quiet is dangerous. I know that... I know him better than anyone. "I really fucking hate you right now, Christina."
Then, the line goes dead.
I can barely breathe, I'm crying so hard. I can barely see the road in front of me, so I pull over for a moment, put my head in my hands and sob.
I know he doesn't mean it. Of course he doesn't. Will wouldn't say that, he would never say that to me. I know he wouldn't. But still, it stings. It's what I've been afraid of for so long, and hearing him say it just makes me feel sick.
I scream into my hands, trying to relieve the pain in my chest.
I look up and wipe my eyes and cheeks, taking a few deep breaths to calm myself down.
And then, suddenly and out of nowhere, I hear the screeching of tyres, and before I have the chance to react, a car slams into mine. I hear the crash, feel a sudden blinding pain, and then there's nothing.
Will's POV
I regret saying it as soon as I hang up the phone. I didn't mean to say it. I was just so angry, and... it just came out. Of course I didn't mean what I said. I don't hate her... of course I don't. I love her, more than anything. I hope she knows that.
I sigh gently and look down at my phone, debating on whether or not to call her again, to tell her how much I love her, and that I was stupid before.
I wait a few minutes to give her some time to calm down, which I know she'll need. And then I dial her number again. But she doesn't pick up.
I get an uneasy feeling all of a sudden. She always picks up her phone. No matter how mad she is, Christina always answers.
I don't know what makes me do it, but before I know what I'm doing, I'm driving down the route she uses to get to work and back home. The drive's only a few minutes long, so I know I'll find her soon enough.
I turn around a corner, and then I see it. Christina's car on the side of the road, another car smashed into it, on her side. I pull over as quickly as I can, and get out of my car, running over to the wreckage.
No, no... Christina, you've gotta be okay.
I open the door to the passenger side, and wish that I was more prepared for what I saw.
Christina's completely slumped forward, glass shattered everywhere. There's so much blood... too much blood. Tears begin to burn behind my eyes; I know she can't have survived this. But still, I don't want to believe it. I lean forwards and pull her towards me, and she just falls, lifelessly, slumping against me. I pull her out of the car, and hold her tightly.
She isn't breathing, and when I bring a hand to her neck to feel her pulse, there's nothing. I scream, and then let myself sob, clinging onto her, hiding my face in her hair.
"No... No. Christina, I'm so sorry. I... I didn't mean it, honestly I didn't... I... I was just angry, and... I love you. So much. Oh god, I love you..." I bend over and kiss her forehead, resting my forehead on hers. "No, no, no... please... I..."
Her blood is all over me by this point, and yet I still can't let her go. I know what as soon as I do, she's gone, forever.
And I'm never gonna hold her in my arms again. I'm never gonna kiss her again as she comes home, or fall asleep beside her, or wake up beside her. I'll never be able to talk to her again. I'll never hear her tell me that she loves me. I'll never be able to comfort her again while she cries, and she won't be here to comfort me, like she isn't now. I'm never going to be able to look into her beautiful eyes again, or hear her beautiful voice.
She'll never hear me apologize, or tell her how much I love her. The last thing she ever heard me say, probably the last words she ever heard, were telling her that I hated her. The last thing she ever said to me, her last words, were asking me why I didn't leave her, that I could be happy with someone else, that clearly, I wasn't happy with her. But I was; I was so happy with her.
I want more than anything to put it right, and yet I know I'll never have the chance.
"You know what, darling? There never was anyone else. There never will be anyone else," I whisper to her, stroking her hair gently, like I always would if she were upset, "I didn't mean anything I said when we were fighting, honestly... I... I was just angry, I was scared that you were gonna leave me, and I was gonna lose you... I just never saw it happening in this way. And you... you're the most beautiful person I know. No one's ever gonna replace you, ever. I love you, Christina... I'm gonna miss you."
There are people here now, and they're taking Christina away from me. I barely have the strength to fight against them; they just take her, and I'm left alone, kneeling at the side of the road, sobbing.
I'll never forget you, Christina. And I'm so sorry.
Author's Note - Just posting this here bc I was driving my followers on ig insane oops
