Nothing Lasts Forever

4 | Polaroid

I couldn't believe this was actually happening to me right now. It felt like I was stuck in this ever-lasting nightmare with no end in sight. Wonderful. Why had Rachel never told me she invited Santana and her dumb fiancé to her birthday party? This was unfair and it didn't make sense that she never talked to me about it. Quinn didn't even mention anything about it either and I doubt Rachel would keep that a secret from her.

I slammed the door shut once I arrived home, dropping the groceries on the kitchen isle. No one was around today, they were all away visiting their families and whatsoever, so I had the house to myself. Gladly. Because I don't think I could hold back my hand from hitting Rachel right in the face, probably break her nose and ruin her beautiful singing voice.

While I unpacked the groceries and alcohol I had bought for Rachel's birthday, I tried to distract myself by thinking about the fact that my mom would be coming home today. I missed her. My mom and I have always had a tight bond, especially when Santana left, she was always there for me. At times, she was the only one that really understood me, I guess, aside from Quinn. She never made fun of me either, therefore I called her my best friend. Yeah, I also had Tina and Mercedes but I'd never talk to them about my real problems and the fact that I still dreamt about Santana almost every night.

A few hours of zapping through the most boring TV programs passed before my phone vibrated against my thigh, pulling me out of my daze. "From Mom: Hey teddy, I'll be home in about forty minutes. I brought cake!" I giggled to myself, a soft smile on my face. "You're the best, mom. Can't wait!" I replied back before I figured there wasn't much time left and the house could use some tidying since, when everyone was here, there were seven people sleeping, eating and getting ready in this household: Tina, Mike, Noah, Mercedes, Quinn, Rachel and I. I still don't know why I agreed to let everyone stay at my house over Christmas.

Starting in the living room, where Mercedes and Noah slept on two couches, I cleaned up their stuff, grimacing when I lifted some of Puck's, as known as Noah, boxers, immediately tossing them into the laundry basket. Yuck. When the living room and kitchen were clean, I proceeded upstairs to the guest room. Since Rachel and Quinn and Mike and Tina were a couple and they each shared a room, I decided not to enter them and just closed the doors, not really wanting to see what was in there, in all honesty.

Last but not least I went into the last guest room which was occupied by me and put away my clothing and properly made the bed. Puck thought it was stupid of me to use the guest room instead of my old room because if I did, there would be enough space for everyone and then someone wouldn't have to sleep on the couch.

I felt selfish but I just couldn't sleep in that room. Everything that was in this room literally reminded me of my ex-girlfriend. Ouch, it hurt saying that. I hadn't even been in this room since I left Ohio eight years ago. I walked up to the door, tracing the stickers that said "Brittany" in all kinds of colors, a sigh erupting my lips. Then I pushed down the handle and opened it, slowly walking into the baby-blue painted room. Nothing changed, it looked the same since I had left.

There were still all of the same photos I hung up on the wall when I was still with her. Before I took a closer look at them, I closed my eyes, breathing in deeply for a brief moment. You got this, Pierce. With heavy feet, I stepped forward as my eyes landed on the different pictures. I reached for one of them, taking it off the wall with a sigh. The pad of my thumb swiped over it, brushing the dust off of it. I still remembered the moment behind the picture just perfectly.

Prom 2009.

After a month of dating, I asked Santana out to Prom and she said yes even though at that point, no one except Quinn, Rachel and some other friends knew that we were dating. For Santana, it was a pretty big deal to keep our relationship a secret since she didn't want anyone to judge her for her sexuality. It was tough for her, especially since her parents were strictly catholic and not really tolerant towards people that didn't match their ideology of life. To this day, I still didn't know if she ever even came out to her family. But seeing her with Sam now, I doubted it.