Silent No More

Sherlock suddenly finds himself on Molly's doorstep after telling John and Mycroft he needed air and promised not to get drugs. He is exhausted, emotionally and mentally drained, and starving. It's nearly 2am when he picks the lock and sneaks his way in. The light was still on. He had to make this right, after all, it was Eurus' fault (and yes, maybe partially his as well through the years) that she was hurting. But Sherlock hopes he can make all of that pain go away.

His eyes fall on her petite form curled up on her light pink sofa, cocooned in a large gray, fluffy blanket and watching a horror movie. Sherlock walks over and stands in front of her; he's a bit surprised that she doesn't even flinch.

"You're in the way of my movie."

"Molly-"

"Don't, Sherlock."

"Molly please..."

"Y'know, you've said that an awful lot today. /Please/. Funny enough it's never ever followed up by a thank you unless requested."

Sherlock swallows and gently lowers himself onto the sofa next to her. "I am sorry. More than you can ever know. I'm not just saying it to say it, I really am."

Molly scoffs. "Yeah, sure. Look, Mycroft and Lestrade explained when they stormed my freaking house looking for cameras and bombs. I've heard it all. I need time."

"I respect that...but-"

"See? There it is! There's always a "but" with you isn't there? You always have to have your damn way." She turns to look at him, a fiery anger in her eyes, backed by a lot of hurt and suffering.

"Molly...", he says calmly and softly. "I need to say this. I know it's not fair, and you feel bruised and hurt. Please, just let me say this, and if you still want me to leave, I will walk out the door and never contact you again until you initiate."

She sniffles and rubs her face. "Ugh, fine, whatever, just get on with it."

Sherlock reaches for her hand and she pulls it away. "Sherlock, what!?"

He sighs and looks over her face, hoping she can also see the remorse on his. "Eurus is more genius than most anyone in the world. She is in the top 1% of IQs—"

"I don't want an explanation of your sister Sherlock, I get it...just go."

"No. That's not what I'm saying, I know you're angry and rightfully so, just...please let me finish."

Molly huffs and crosses her arms, setting her jaw tightly.

"Eurus saw something inside of me that I had suppressed for over seven years now. I have no idea how she saw it, but it must have been blatantly obvious to her when...when you helped me to detox this last time, and picked me up from the fake therapist's office in the ambulance. Despite my offensive sarcasm and crude words, she saw behind them in ways I didn't choose to acknowledge..."

"Okay and? Good for her, she's a demonic genius psychopath."

"You don't understand yet. Molly...she saw into my heart. She was searching for my emotional being, one that I have suppressed since Uni. Feelings have never been my area, but she saw them straight through as if I could never hide. She saw m-my feelings...for you."

Molly scoffs through a laugh. "Oh, wow, is this some sort of twisted joke? I really think you've run out of those today."

"It's not a joke, not a game, not an experiment, not a case. It's just...me. Which is usually worse. Despite being forced to pry those words from you, the one consolation is that you made me say it first. I've always skirted around your feelings, avoided them like the plague because I didn't want to lose you as a friend. But until you forced /me/ to say them to you, I had never formally acknowledged them. I tried not to for a multitude of reasons Molly."

She swallows the lump in her throat and looks into his eyes, seeing sincerity. "Wh-what are you saying, Sherlock?", her voice is calmer, but shaky.

"The last time I said those words to you, they came with this enormous realization that...that yes, they were absolutely true. It's true, Molly. It's always been true."

Molly's eyes well with tears. "Then say it...go on."

Sherlock smiles his genuine smile that makes Molly melt into a puddle, the one reserved for just her in their fond moments. "I love you, Molly Hooper. I have forced myself to never acknowledge that because if I had, my fear of you getting hurt was almost equal to the sentiment I hold for you. I have a dangerous job. The people I care about get hurt, that's what happens. I...I am terrified of anything happening to you, anyone laying a finger on you."

She cries and he gently opens his arms to her, embracing her as she weeps. "I love you too, Sherlock Holmes. I know the risk of being with you, of being anywhere close, and it's my choice to take that risk." Molly gently cups his face and his eyes close softly, leaning into her touch, a lonely tear trickling down his cheek.

"I suppose sometimes you meet someone who you fall in love with so much, that you stay silent. It was for your wellbeing, Molly. It always was. In doing so, I saved you from Moriarty's hitlist, from Magnussen's view, from Smith's death-fueled hands, and almost from Eurus, until she made me see that love can protect just as equally as it can destroy." He opens his clear blue-green eyes to look into hers. "This...this is new to me. It terrifies me more than any criminal or perpetrator I have ever faced. My heart horrifies me because I single-handedly get people hurt with my love. Look at John and Mary...Mary believed in me too, a-and...", he trails off and his lip trembles.

"Sherlock...I want the risk. I want you, however you're willing to have me. Nobody can predict what will happen years from now, nobody knows what life will hold. I just know that I want to experience it alongside you. No matter what."

Sherlock embraces her and relishes in her warmth, breathing her in. His shoulders slump, his body finally giving into his exhaustion.

"You should stay here tonight, you're absolutely exhausted in more than one way, and rightly so. Go and wash up and I'll get you some food. You must be starving too. I have some leftover lasagna. Your pajamas are in the last drawer of my dresser."

Sherlock cups her face and places his lips to hers, making her jump a bit before melting into it, their lips and tongues moving in sync. Molly's fingers find his curls and he hums pleasurably on her lips before pulling away gently. Molly gapes a bit at him.

"I meant it for real, I love you."

"I love you too", she grins. "Now go on. We need to fix you up now that you fixed me up."

Sherlock smiles and nods, heading down her hallway. Molly savors the tingling feeling on her lips and beams, shaking her head happily and moving to the kitchen to warm up his lasagna.