All Too Well

Discovery

Silence rang loudly in your ears, your body rigid as chills overtook you. Gooseflesh pricked your skin. You heaved in a deep breath, your mind so frozen you'd forgotten to breathe.

"Steve's..." you mumbled, the volume lessened by a large exhale.

Bucky watched you with sad eyes. It was a familiar look. He watched with those same eyes as you sobbed and screamed. Though time had certainly passed, it was like you were paralyzed by it. You longed to feel how you did before Steve left, be that girl, but you were still looking for her.

Not to say you weren't happy with Jamie, with the little life you'd built yourselves. You were happy,but as much as you'd like to deny it, you are the one who was left. Steve got to go on and be happy with someone else, and you were left like a crumpled piece of paper.

You were left with the wreckage and the memories of a man that you remembered all too well, despite your efforts. Jamie was the glue holding you together, without him you may just have fallen apart into disrepair. But that doesn't mean you aren't still very broken.

"Doll..." he hesitated, terrified to send you off the deep end again, "You don't have to see him, if you don't want to."

You looked up with watery eyes. He continued, "Sam and I, we'll make sure he can't find you. You can move-" You cut him off.

"No. We are not moving. Steve has thrown my life around enough. James doesn't deserve to have his life upended just because his father is a prick." You voice rose in intensity, threatening not only James' sleep, but the structure of the house. It rattled in it's foundation.

"Okay, okay doll. No running," Bucky soothed, "You don't have to leave. You're right, you deserve better."

You nodded your head stiffly as your lip quivered, sobs locked in your throat but still shaking you nonetheless.

Despite yourself, you began to imagine Steve with his son. Seeing the same smile on both of their cheeks, James running circles around his father, the two of them giggling on the lawn. It was too much and the dam broke.

You hurled yourself at Bucky, muffling your cries in his strong shoulder, staining the faded blue t-shirt stretched over his body.

The metal hand drew a lazy shape on your back while his flesh hand held your cheek, thumb stroking your hair. He shushed you, just like he'd done before.

When you first met Bucky, he was apprehensive of your presence. You were like him, powerful but temper on a knife's edge. He was worried of what could happen if you were set off. Still, you tried to befriend him as much as you could, for Steve's sake. You would've done anything for him.

It wasn't until your first mission alone with Bucky that you both began to trust one another. The pair of you were shoved in a tiny motel room, conducting surveillance on some Hydra transport. It wasn't meant to be a big deal, that is until you learned that Hydra was recruiting street kids to act as their foot soldiers. To them, they were disposable.

You couldn't help but see yourself in those kids, knowing you were once on the street yourself, knowing you could've been one of them if the team hadn't rescued you.

Bucky, while not thrilled of the change in plan, went along, covering you. You shattered the glass in the truck carrying the weapons from your hiding spot off the side of the road. Then, Bucky came in from the back, disarming the two drivers.

You opened the back hatch of the truck, eyes going wide. There were thousands of guns and cases of ammunition. Bucky had wanted to destroy it but you thought better; take the weapons. Bruce and Tony could analyze them, understand where they came from and trace back to the supplier.