Puck Aids || ❤

002 : Shades of blue

Dear Diary,

Karma is a bitch.

-Andy

***

There are people who hear coulors, I was told.

As beautiful as it sounded, I found it hard to imagine hearing do- re- mi- far- so - la- ti just by glancing around. Even the thought felt stressful.

However, what's more stressful than that is standing next to a certain blue eyed stranger wondering what to say next. Was his eyes peacock blue or was it royal blue? It was hard to tell in the darkness.

The thick silence was suffocating.

I usually don't find it hard to communicate with people for words did naturally come. Usually.

Right now the situation was somehow different.

A moment ago he coughed blood. Which was not a good sign or a symptom.

My lips, which were almost frozen like icepops, parted a little as I decided to go with the first thought that came to my mind. Are you alright?' Was what I was going to ask, but his monotone beat me to it, as he spoke.

"I have AIDS"

His voice echoed through my ear canal all the way down my body.

Some researches say that there's a transient dopamine surge everytime you hear bad news. Dopamine makes you happy. Dopamine makes me sick. I tried not to flinch as I stood there looking down on the sleeping city away from the hospital premises. I dared not to look at him.

In med school they never really taught how to be a barer of bad news. Our seniors used to say that with practice and experience you will figure out the art. They weren't exactly wrong because most patients came expecting the worst, so they were always understanding. Only a few would actually go through a cascade of disbelief. Yet, as the barer of bad news no matter whether the patient took it well or not, you feel the same feeling. As if something was rotting inside your intestines. Ironically instant noodles do rot inside your intestines and that's what most doctors have during a night shift.

"Are you affraid?" He asked.

Was I affraid?

Affraid of his disease or of the way he casually wrapped the blood drenched handkerchief in a plastic bag, he had pulled out from his pants and sanitized his hands? No.

"Yes"

"Call someone to open the door then"

He shrugged as he glanced at the closed rooftop door. I looked at him cluelessly and closed my eyes in realisation. How could I forget? The door gets locked from inside all the time, which must be why he had stuck his hospital card through the door crack.

I felt an unfamiliar pang in my chest. He stayed not because I had asked.

"Fast" he added. His face was stoic. He was still attracting the moonlight as if he was dancer under the spotlight. I watched as he rubbed his palms together elegantly before putting them in his pant pockets.

"I'm affraid, but" I started. "Not of you" my voice was a whisper. "Of blood"

He smirked. "And you work in a hospital?" It was more of a statement than a question with an etch of sarcasm.

"Things happened that way"

Would he mock me more if I were to say that I'm a doctor? I had to run some errands before so I wasn't in my hospital wear, which was a good thing or else I would've been frozen to death by now on the rooftop.

"Hmm" He was in deep thought for a while. His face was flushed in pale. He seemed to be clenching his teeth. It was colder now than before.

"You should go inside" My words went ignored. "I'll call someone to open the door". He might catch a cold easily if he stayed any longer. I pulled out my phone to text a junior.

"No need" He said glancing at me one last time from head to toe really fast. Talking about weird.

He then simply walked towards the locked door and pulled something out of his pockets. The door made a small ticking sound and it was pulled open in just a few seconds.

"After you" He said.

I entered through the door he held open for me and we sldescended a set of stairs in our usual silence.

His eyes were royal blue and they appeared deeper than before now that we are in a well lit background.

"Do you want me to get you something?" My voice was hoarse but it felt comfatable talking inside the comparatively warmer hospital building than the rofftop.

"Why would you?"

"I work here" I shruged. "Will you be alright?" I scaned his eyes not really knowing what I was hoping to see in them.

"Why won't I be?" He kept asnwering me with another question not allowing me to get to my point.

"You tell me" He smiled a little as he stoped on a step.

"You'll be fine". I said aloud more as a command than a statement.

"Good"

He shrugged as he waited on the same step, one step above me on the staircase going all the way down in a building with loads of floors.

"I'll drop you, to your bed" I said eyeing him suspiciously.

"What am I, five?" He patted my head with the dorsal side of his hand before jumping down to the ground skipping four steps. So immature of him.

"See ya adound doc" he smirked before starting to walk in a corridor to our left. I started at his back until he made a turn from around the corner and disappeared from my sight. My phone began to ring and I received it perfectly on time.

"Jen. We have an emergency. Broken arm. I'm sending him off for an Xray." My colleagues was definitely running at the other end of the phone call. I started to speed walk towards the elevator.

"Will be there" I said.

"No. I can handle this. There's something worse. Someone hung himself in ward 10. Will you handle it there?"

I stopped.

I could hear my heart in my ribcage as a familure sickening feeling spreaded like a wildfire encasularing me.

Was he dead?

-To be continued