(in memory of) Jules Bianchi

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Its been five years since you lost the love of your life and the scars that that race I Japan left will never go away. There are no words in any language that express the pain you felt and still feel from when you heard his heart stop beating, sitting in his room in Nice's hospital, your husband was gone. You two had so many plans for the future, build a family together, live in Monaco, see Charles, your godson, grow up and race for Ferrari. But that never came, not with Jules by your side. 

You and Charles were scared deeply after that night but you never let go of each other's hands. You tried to be strong for him but he knew you were breaking and so you were each other's rocks. You promised each other that you would make Jules proud. Charles by racing for Ferrari and you by keep going. Teaching french and taking care of your children

Charles is racing for Ferrari and you were able to see from up close how he worked hard for everything he achieved and deserves. The leclerc family were like your family and they never let you go, even though there were moments when you almsot gave up but Charles and his brothes were there to pick you up from the ground and bring you back to the light. Also whenever you looked at you children, yes before Jules went away you were pregnant of twins. A girl and boy who have his eyes and his smile, they are beautiful and you love them with everything in you. 

Sometimes in the middle of the night you wake up after having a nightmare about that race and the night at the hospital. You take one of the photo albums filled with memories and flashback hits you. 

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flashback

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You and your parents have just moved to Nice, coming from the busy Paris streets t was a good chance. Nice got your heart with the French Riviera vibe, blue sky, clear blue ocean, and the beach. You loved the beach and the sea breeze so Nice was perfect for you. Your parents got a cozy apartment near the beach and said that the neighbors were lovely too and had a son your age. You didn't think too much about it cause boys your age only though about football and cars. You're an F1 fan yourself but you're too shy to say anything when people are talking about it. What your heart craves for is literature, a book that takes you to another place and makes you feel whatever the main character feels. Sometimes all you need is to leave your reality.

After you're all settled in your parents tell you that the neighbors are coming for dinner and you shall look nice and interact with them instead of sticking your head on a book. You choose to wear a red dress that goes to your knees and its flowy and light. When you hear voices from downstairs you rush down the stair and stand by your parents. They present you to the adult couple with a good looking boy by their side. You learn his name is Jules and he stares at for some time but every time you look at him he diverts his eyes somewhere else. 

"Y/N, sweetie, why don't you and Jules go take a walk near the neighborhood while the adults have a talk?" You nod and Jules leads you to the beach. You two spend hours talking and getting to know each other. Your shy person and his outgoing type clash and its as if you're made for each other. Soon he takes you back home and you hug him goodbye, happy to see him again tomorrow to watch the Austrian Grandprix. 

From then on you talked to him every day and became friends faster than you ever thought you could. 

-

Your hands flip through the album and you stop on one of your favorite pictures. You hugging Jules after one of his karting races. He's sweating and by your heights, you were already teenagers and the love and happiness are visible from miles. Your mind takes you to all the times you and Jules went to Monaco and took care of Charles and Arthur, little Charles. You flip to the next page and theres another picture of you and Jules hugging after a karting race but now it was Charles's. You remember how happy he was for wining not just Charles but Jules, he was feeling like a proud dad and it was cute to see. 

Charles also has this photo and every time you go visit him at his place you pass this picture that is hanged right next to the one from your wedding, you and jules smiling from ear to ear while hugging Charles. 

He once told you how that was the happiest day of his life. Being Jules's bestman, making fun of how nervous his godfather was and he never forgets the ords Jules said to his younger self. 

"Charlo, you might be laughing right now but once you have found the right woman. The one that makes you wake up smiling about her and go to sleep to dream about her. One that makes you feel whole and you know you don't need anything else other than her in your arms. Then, my boy, you will understand what I'm feeling and you will remember my words." 

You've seen Charles and Giada's relationship and now you're seeing Charles and Charlotte. It's different, they remind you of how you and Jules were and you love having them over. The kids love Charles, their godfather, and Charlotte has become family too. You two spend so much time together that whenever she's not with Charles she's with you, shopping, watching races, or being with the kids. Charle has told you that whenever he looks at Charlotte, Jules's words come to his mind and he knows she's the one. 

Your life ain't easy, especially without your love but you have so many other reasons to stay that you know you're making Jules proud and he's looking after you, your children, Charles, Arthur, and Charlotte. 

Every

Step

Of

The 

Way




A/N: I'm not crying, are you crying? we are not crying! 

That one was one hell of a request and I loved writing it. Hope it's up to your expectations. I wrote every word with love! 

Requested by @Darkparadise479! Thank you for the request❤️😁 give her a follow!

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you're crying now, i know

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you're crying now, i know...its okay. 😔😭

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