forgive yourself

what I learned today

28/09/20

what does blocking anyone do? it just hurts you more because you know that in reality your just trying to forget the best things in your life and even knowing that you just want it all to stop all the pain that others bring you you want them to feel the same even though you know you will hate yourself for hurting the people your staying alive for but what about when you lose one of the main reasons your alive what happens when the person you trusted and loved more then anything breaks your heart and you want to hate them but you can't because you know you love them too much to do that and then your stuck and you no longer know what to do because all that ever happens is when you finally let someone in they break you down so much that you don't know what to do because your so venerable that you no longer want this anymore because being happy isn't even the most important thing its something you want but it isn't something that makes you happy we make our own future we delude ourselves into thinking you want something because it would take everything in you to let go and stop caring but that's not what you want to do you don't want to stop you wanna keep caring because that's what you want you ant them to come back because of the typical "if someone really loves you they will come back" but they never come back because they gave up when they shouldn't they give up on the one thing that was probably the one thing they needed to get through life they gave up on the one person who would have made their life worth living but now im stuck and idk what to do besides forget about how I feel and just stop feeling so I can help other people rather then myself sure all im writing could be bullshit but honestly its not is it? so many people would either agree of disagree because no one knows what they want in life anymore, you just need to remember to tell the people you love how much you love and appreciate them because everything could be taken away from you quicker then anything. 

-Luna