Seven Crows

My daughter was about to die. She has been fighting with cancer for months, yet there was no sign that the therapy worked. I often sat beside her bed for days fighting with my tears, about to lose hope. But she seemed to feel worse than I did. She barely ate and often cried herself to sleep. It broke my heart again every day to see her lose her spirits. She used to be a happy child.

Then, a few weeks ago, I first dreamt of them. A big old tree in a foggy field and seven crows siting upon it. I just stood there looking at them and they stared back with deep blue eyes. I dreamt of them again every night that followed. Until one night I could not take it any longer and I shouted at them. I told them to do something. That they should help her. They quaffed no answer, but one by one took off into the fog and left me alone.

For days nothing changed. But then, one morning, my daughter smiled at me. It was the first simile I saw in weeks. After that she seemed to become happier every day. Until we often sat together laughing over the silliest things. But our luck shouldn't last. I soon I soon was told that there was nothing left that the doctors could try. But even after I told her, she kept smiling. When I asked her why she just said that she has found her piece and that she wants to laugh with me for as long as she can...

And we did.

Last night I dreamt of the crows again. As before I stood in front of the trees, but for the first time the crows spoke to me. "We have done what we could." All of them said at once. "But now we can do no more. Be prepared for the pain that awaits you when you awake. Grief. But do not let it consume you, for at home your wife awaits you. Be there for her. Give her the gift of all-consuming grief that you so desperately desire. This is the only advice we can give you now." And with that they took off.

When I opened my eyes, the sun shone through the hospital window. My eyes fell upon my daughter's body. She passed away last night. She died peacefully. At least that's what I'm told, and I like to believe so. I decided to follow the crows' advice and cried besides her bed until all tears I had stored up over the past months have left my body. Then I got up. I did all the arrangements that had to be done. And after that I left. I will go home to my family and I will try to be strong for them. And as I leave the hospital, I see a crow on the sidewalk looking at me with tears in its deep blue eyes.