Completely & Stupidly: Forever and Ever

Chapter 7. Charity

 It was Chas' turn to open up the pub the following morning, and so Charity finally had a rare Sunday to herself. She rose cheerfully and well rested at nine o'clock to the quiet chirping of the birds that had decided to build their nest in the guttering of Jacob's Fold. As the birds sang in springtime song, she flung the warm duvet off her body and stuffed her feet into Vanessa's slippers, deciding to slip into 'domestic mode', as she liked to call it, and nip downstairs to make breakfast for Vanessa, while she snoozed away peacefully undisturbed beneath the blankets. As she made her way down the stairs, carefully avoiding that one step that always creaked loudly when stepped on, she tiptoed into the kitchen and gently tugged at the handle upon the fridge and took out a bottle of milk and the almost empty tub of butter. With one hand she flicked the kettle on and with the other she popped some bread into the toaster then proceeded to claw at a tin of beans that had scuffled its way to the back of the cupboard. As her fingertips just about skimmed the tin she realised how hard it must be for Vanessa to do this for the kids most mornings and so she giggled to herself as she thought about buying her a step ladder for practicality, but mainly for a joke at her own expense, although the smile on her face faded as she thought about the look Vanessa would give her if she pointed out anything contributing towards her tiny height ever again, so she knocked the idea on the head. As she stood lost in a daydream while the microwave warmed up half of the tin of baked beans, the toaster popped alongside the kettle and snapped her back to reality, where she then got on with making the rest of the breakfast, keeping a watchful eye on the microwave so that its incessant beeping wouldn't scream the house down and wake everybody up. When she was all finished, steam danced from two fat mugs of tea and caressed that of the single plate of beans on toast as she carried the breakfast up on a tray. "Woah" she fumed, with a sharp exhale of breath as her foot collided with one of the kids shoes that had been left laying at the bottom of the stairs. "Stupid kids are trying to kill me" She muttered to herself as she kicked the tiny shoe flying across the room before making the rest of the journey up the stairs. The bedroom door rested on the latch and made for an easy push as she used her elbow to open it, revealing a stirring Vanessa inside. "Good Morning" Charity beamed proudly as she and the breakfast appeared in Vanessa's line of sight. "Aw" Vanessa gasped, placing one hand over her heart as she realised, she was receiving a surprise breakfast in bed. Charity's smile almost touched her ears as she placed the tray down on Vanessa's lap. "Are you not having anything?" She asked, her eyes still in puppy dog form as she noticed just the one plate sitting before her. "Me, eat my cooking? Never" Charity joked as she took a sip of piping hot tea that burned her lip. Vanessa shook her head playfully and began to slice away at the two rounds of burnt toast hiding beneath a mountain of beans. "Thank you" She added as she took her first bite. "You're welcome" Charity breathed and popped a small kiss upon her forehead. "You're in a good mood" Vanessa jibed, wondering if her other half was up to something. "Yes well, I had a rather good night" She teased, "And I feel like doing something nice today, with you and the kids before we start running around like headless chickens the rest of the week" She added, referring to their busy 'last minute wedding prep' that they had organized rather chaotically. "What do you fancy?" Vanessa asked with her mouth full. "I don't know, I might see what Noah and Sarah fancy doing", "Nothing out in public then" Vanessa scoffed at the very thought of the teenagers daring to be seen dead with them. "Well, they have no choice this time, after practically scaring me to death last night, they owe me one", "That was hilarious" Vanessa recalled as she pictured Charity's frightened face. "Yes alright, thank you babe" Charity scoffed. "In fact, I might go get one over on them now" She grinned. "Please don't, it'll only end in a mess that I'll have to clean up" Vanessa begged. "No, it won't, I promise no mess" Charity spoke menacingly. Before Vanessa could say or do anything to stop her, Charity was out of the room and creeping across the landing like a burglar. Vanessa shook her head and paid no attention to Charity's pranking antics, not wanting to get involved in what was only ever going to become a war zone, and instead focused on eating her breakfast in peace.
Every morning, like clockwork, Sarah and Noah would end up fighting over who would get to shower first, due to the lack of hot water left behind by whoever had managed to sneak in before the other, and so Charity knew her plan to scare them senseless was one of her best ideas in a while. Quietly, she climbed into the bath and pulled the shower curtain across, hiding herself inside and waited to hear movement coming from their bedrooms. Sarah had woken up first and shuffled her way across the landing and politely knocked at Charity and Vanessa's bedroom door. "Morning, that looks... nice" Sarah said, clearly pointing towards Vanessa's surprise breakfast. Charity screwed up her face at the thought of them making fun of her attempt at romance which made her all the more adamant to scare Sarah when she inevitably came to the bathroom. Soon after, Noah emerged from behind his locked door, which he had been told a million times not to do at night. Charity clenched her fists in momentarily frustration as she heard the lock slide out of the bolt. Another reason the kids deserved to be scarred for life. For what seemed like hours, Charity waited barefoot in the cold tub and almost considered giving up, when finally, there was movement and raised voices as Sarah announced she was heading to the shower. "No way, it's my turn to go first" Noah boomed. "Um no, you went first twice in the week" Sarah argued back, and in no time a fight broke out and the sound of scuffling and barging could be heard over the sound of their approaching footsteps. Charity felt a quick burst of adrenaline course through her body as she readied herself to scream in their faces with her hands clawed out in front of her like a monster. Through the shower curtain Charity saw the bathroom door open, and a figure grew closer as the arguing continued. She counted back from three in her head as a hand reached out and gripped the curtain, then with a big roar, Charity's voice filled the bathroom as she not so brilliantly executed her prank. A loud scream echoed among them and Charity's face dropped into a fear of her own as she found Vanessa on the receiving end. "Oh babe, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" Charity panicked, fearing for her life as Vanessa stopped screaming and glared at her, her eyes seemingly boring right into her head. Heart racing at the unexpected scare, Vanessa immediately knew what to do to punish Charity, and she didn't even have to say a word to do so, she just reached out her hand and yanked the pull switch above her head. The gentle sound of the generator hummed as the shower turned on. Sarah and Noah stood open mouthed in the doorway as Charity became drenched from head to toe. Quickly Sarah snapped a photo of her soaking wet, fully clothed Granny. "Charity's having the first shower today" Vanessa said flatly as she turned and walked out of the room, her messy ponytail swinging as she closed the door behind her, leaving Charity standing alone in the tub, dripping wet.

Eventually, Charity felt brave enough to show her face again. After her unexpected shower, she had changed into clean clothes and came downstairs with her soggy pyjamas in a basket, along with all the other dark washing from the basket in the bathroom. She hated doing the laundry but knew she was going to have to work hard to get back into Vanessa's good books, so without grumbling she headed over to the washing machine and loaded it up with powder. Vanessa was sat upon the sofa reading a magazine and had obviously heard her arriving in the room but was blatantly ignoring her. Charity caught Sarah's eye as she craned her neck to see her and Noah sat at the table eating bowls of cereal. "You're in trouble" Sarah giggled, with a smug smile on her face. Charity wanted to pull a face back but was afraid Vanessa would see so instead she remained quiet and carried on putting the washing inside the machine. Not knowing which button was the right one to start the wash, Charity began pressing them all hoping that one of them would start the cycle. Noah let out a quiet but deep laugh from behind his spoon that caught Vanessa's attention. Without noticing, Charity continued panicking beside the washing machine as Vanessa came over and pressed the very obvious power button that she had overlooked. "Thank you" Charity mouthed. Vanessa folded her arms and walked away, but unbeknownst to Charity, with a secret smile on her face as she winked at the kids for playing along. "So, uh, you guys want to do something nice today?" Charity asked in a small voice, still thinking she was in the dog house with her family. "Like what?" Noah asked with a shrug. "Anything you want" Charity ushered. "Arcade" Noah answered with one word. "Bowling" Sarah added. "Ok great. V?" Charity turned to her fiancé shyly. "Yes?", "I'm sorry for scaring you" She mumbled as she played with her shirt sleeves. Vanessa was struggling to keep up with her poker face and could feel a smile breaking through, so she looked at the kids who were also trying to hide their smiles by this point. "Apology accept-" She began but broke off as she turned her interest somewhere over Charity's shoulder. "What's that?" She asked in a raised voice, full of pretend panic. Charity stiffened for a split second but styled it out smoothly. "What? I'm not going to fall for that" She announced smugly, but as she did, she felt two hands grab onto her shoulders. As she whipped her head around to scream, the rest of the room filled with laughter as it was made clear that Tracey had let herself in through the back door, with the kids. "Oh my God, I actually scared you then, didn't I?" Tracey gushed, proud of herself. "I hate all of you" Charity cried out, but joined in on the laughter at her expense when she realised, she was now back in Vanessa's good books. "Come here, you silly mare" Vanessa chuckled and pulled Charity in close for a hug. Johnny and Moses ran across the room where they were scooped up off the floor and into their mother's arms. "Hey you two, how do you fancy a nice fun day out?" Vanessa asked, looking to both boys for their reaction. A mixture of 'yes' and 'yay' was shouted out in excitement. "Yay" Vanessa joined in, "And, Mummy Charity is paying for everything, yay" She whooped. Charity's face was a picture as she placed one hand on her hip. "Fine" She announced, "But you're driving", "Uh, no way, besides we won't all fit in the car together. I'll phone for a taxi" Vanessa said. "I'll do it" Tracey chirped, whipping her phone from her pocket. "What? You're not coming and all?" Charity moaned, "Yes I am" Tracey retaliated. "You don't even know where we're going?", "Don't care, I'm in" She boasted. Charity rolled her eyes, "Fine. The more the merrier I guess" She muttered to herself, but deep down she liked that Tracey was coming along, she could keep the kids in toe when they inevitably became filled with sugar.