Why is it that when you love somebody, or somebodies that you get the feeling of pain or jealousy. Even though you are smiling on the outside on the inside you just know that even though nothing is wrong, your brain makes your heart think that they will either hurt you or abandon you.
Even though feelings make us human, its also what kills us because we fall for people some are taken while others are open minded. Yes even though we are all happy together there is something in our minds that make us doubt the other.
This feeling grows an grows an grows until it finally bursts leaving you in nothing but a helpless shell clinging onto some hope that they will see past all the fake smiles, the distancing an the fake laughter to see that you are also hurting but sometimes they never do.
They smile along thinking your happy but on the inside your not and they cant tell because we are so scared of showing who we really are, because we are scared that if we do open our hearts that they will leave us for someone better an this scares us to the point where most of us lose sleep or we distance ourselves away from them. We are so scared of being hurt that we put our hearts in a box an surround it with chains an then lock it hoping that one day the right person will come an unlock it.
We are so blind about finding the right one that we make the ones around us worry or the ones who truly love us scared because we went from being happy with them at one moment to being upset an petty an not thinking about how they feel. We become so caught up in our heads that we can no longer see the ones who will stand by us through everything because the depressing an angry voices in our head tell us that they no longer want us, that we are bothering them, or it even gets to the point to where you start to think "whats the point in staying if i'm not gonna find the one an die alone".
News flash the ones closest to you are the ones who are gonna stick with you through thick an thin. Friends, family hell even some ex's will stick by our side because even though we hurt them they can still understand us. We all get in our head sometimes but do we ever step out of it an look around at what we have, our partner / partners maybe happy already an want to try something new you cant push it on them but when they grow to love you an you grow to love them you will do anything for them even giving your own life an happiness to make them smile.
Mommy an daddy aren't gonna hold our hands forever sometimes it's best to take a deep breath an silence those voices in our heads an appreciate what we have now because if you take it for granted your gonna end up messing everything up because you couldn't breath or talk to them about it.
