You know my heart like the birds know the sky. / Michiru x Shirou / BNA

Part I.

The serene chilly breeze swam gracefully between and above the buildings of the cumulus of constructions. Anima City's lights broke the view of the stars, and created their own with neon pinks and blues. The Cooperative's building stood peacefully like always, the city was freezing cold in movement, 2:00 AM, no one moved, every single beastman around would be peacefully resting. The tanuki girl laid on her bed, half covered with sheets, tears rolled quietly down her velvety cheeks. She sighed, closing her eyes and trying to push those overwhelming thoughts, but no matter how hard she tried, instead of seeing black when shutting her eyes, she saw how ignorant she had been, how much trouble she had caused, and if she hadn't stopped Shirou at Sylvasta's Cenmedi research center, they could've avoided many beastman dying, if she hadn't heard Alan's prideful yet sneaky words... she looked at her left shoulder, Shirou's bite scar hadn't healed fully yet, she got so scared... his raged eyes had made her frozen, unable to react, specially since she didn't want to hurt him, she would never fight him. His teeth had made him look so threatening. She didn't notice she had started sobbing and started making noise. She put a hand over her mouth, and shut herself before continuing crying softly. Even though she had saved Anima City with Shirou's and Nazuna's help, she still felt guilty for those lost lives. No one blamed her but herself. 

She dizzily sat on her bed, drying off the tears and shaking her head, she took one of her hoodies from her dresser and walked out to the Cooperative's rooftop. Michiru rested her elbows on the cold black metal railing. She gazed at the city, it looked so peaceful yet so colorful, only a couple clubs and discos were eliminating the silence of the city, out of that everything was in pause. She sheathed and unsheathed her claws anxiously, she hadn't gotten enough sleep in the past 5 days, and it was starting to prejudice her in other aspects, she was unable to concentrate, sleepy and tired, sometimes short tempered, but she tried her best to avoid or hide it. A familiar voice from behind her ears startled her, making her turn to face him. "You should be getting rest, Michiru." His polite tone quickly calmed her. "R-right- I just..." she sighed and paused. "Can't." She turned around again to look at the city, resting her head on top of her hands. She perceived Shirou rest his elbows a few inches apart from herself, he looked at the city, his eyes reflected pinks and blues, made him look like never before. She looked down at her hands, closing her eyes. "What has got you concerned?" The wolf beastman questioned, a peeking tone of curiosity behind his question. Michiru waited, was it the best to tell him? Maybe he could help her get over it, he had gone through a similar guilt process too, besides, it isn't bad to ask for help sometimes, though she doubted the nightmares would stop haunting her just for talking with Shirou. 

The tanuki girl exhaled. "I keep having this guilt stone in my throat... it won't let me sleep, or think at all..." her voice was low, sadness hidden in it. Shirou's gaze softened. "You know it wasn't your fault, right Michiru?" He looked at her, he knew exactly what she was feeling. "Sure, better said than done, but perhaps you should forgive yourself for the moments of unsuccessfulness that you may have experienced." He used other words to not mention the incident at Cenmedi's laboratory. Michiru nodded, maybe he was right, but she was yet to feel better. "I know... I just think it's my fault because thanks to me many lives were taken." That wasn't relatable to Shirou, he did feel before responsible for not being able to save his family and friends, but he didn't feel responsible for their very deaths, he didn't feel he had taken their lives. He had no words for that, but he had to let Michiru know she hadn't taken their lives. "Michiru..." he paused. "For as far you may have not avoided their deaths, you didn't take them, and even worse intentionally, not like Alan did." She did agree on that. "I want to go to the pantheon tomorrow." Shirou's ears perked up. "I want to pay my respects and apologize for not being able to avoid their deaths." She spoke secure, yet some of her face hid sadness. "I'll come with you." Shirou affirmed. "You were there for me, I cannot let you do this alone." Shirou's voice was firm, yet soft for her. She blinked, then closed her eyes again, enjoying the chilly breeze and the sent of Shirou's fur, it made her so calm.

 The two stood in silence for what felt like an eternity, yet none of them dared to leave the other, until Michiru spoke. "I'm going to try and sleep." Michiru sighed. "But..." she paused. "Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?" Shirou got surprised by that, but he couldn't say no, he knew that Michiru felt secure with him, and so he did too. Shirou nodded, his face wasn't serious like he always acted, whenever he was with Michiru, he felt so vulnerable. Michiru walked back to her room, didn't wait for Shirou and jumped into her bed, curling up by her pillows and covering her face with sheets. As Shirou entered, he closed the door behind himself, and walked to lay by the couch. He rested his head with his arm, looking at Michiru with admiration. The noise of the city started to fade, as droplets of water started echoing outside. He gained heat with his fur, as the room started feeling a bit cold. He was starting to fall asleep too, as his eyelids started dropping instinctively. A voice shut him back to reality. "S-Shirou..." Michirus voice was trembling. "Can you come? It's getting so cold and... I can't stop thinking about it." Shirou looked at Michiru in amusement, blinked a few times before standing up slowly. He walked towards Michiru's bed as she made space for him. He slowly laid on the bed, careful to not touch her or make her uncomfortable, he covered himself with the sheets to not uncover her. And stayed perplexed. Until he felt Michiu's small figure curl up onto his chest. "Tchk!-" he whispered, slightly baring his fangs in surprise. 

His breathing was a bit heavy, but he took his time to calm down, he had never experienced such- feeling. Michiru turned around, leaving him to hug her, he hesitantly placed his hand over her arm. The water droplets became more abundant, somehow making him relax too. "Shirou?" Michiru's soft voice asked. "Hmm?" He replied. "How did you forgive yourself?" Shirou took his time to think, how did he? He had tasted Michiru's blood so that made him become rational, yet that wasn't an emotional nor psychological answer. "Well..." he thought. "I suppose I came to the conclusion I had done good things..." he continued thinking. "Not only not being able to save my family." It still hurt him, but there was no more guilt. "You influenced in me greatly." He commented. "You taught my old self how to love himself. ...and made me realize I could act now instead of regretting what I cannot fix." He touched Michiru's arm, sliding down to her hand, and putting his under hers, raising their hands slightly. "We aren't so different." He smiled. Michiru stayed in a bit of a shock, but quickly changed her face to a smile, slightly blushing. "You're making that effect in me too." She sighed. "I guess you're right, I should move on, continue with the good things, not forget my past but- forgive it." She intertwined her fingers with his, turning slightly nuzzle his cheek with her nose, she loved how only a few minutes of small pep talk or just, being with Shirou made such a positive impact in her.