Raven Cycle Fanfiction

For Baltimore

Authors Note: So I love writing song fics, and this is one of them, about Pynch of course! The song is obviously called For Baltimore, and all credit for the song goes to All Time Low, and all character credit goes to the wonderful Maggie Stiefvater! Also, there are some small spoilers for Blue Lilly, Lilly Blue.

Right now, I think that you think that I'm
Half drunk, searching for something of
Substance, casually dropping a line, designed
To keep you next to me

Adam was just trying to get homework done. It shouldn't be that hard, really. But it was greatly complicated by the fact that about half an hour ago, Ronan had shown up at his door, and Adam was almost certain he was drunk. He was stumbling around the room like he was in some kind of daze, occasionally slamming his head against the low rafters and cursing eloquently. After the second time this happened, Adam gave up.
"Ronan? Is there... A reason you're here?"
"No. Fuck no. Why would I want to be in your shithole of an apartment?"
Adam fixed him with a penetrating stare, the stare that said he knew Ronan was lying to him, the stare that said he wanted to know why. At least he hoped that was what it conveyed.
"Then why don't you just leave? I can drive you home, if you're incapable of doing so yourself."
Ronan crashed down onto the creaky mattress next to him. Adam noted that their knees were touching, and suppressed the strange, wiggly feeling inside of him that made him notice that Ronan smelled like leather wristbands and Henrietta sweat.
Ronan took awhile to formulate a coherent statement. Jesus, he must be drunk as hell.
"I'd rather be here than back at Monmouth and facing the judgement of Gansey."
Adam nodded, the judgement of Gansey being something he understood. They sat in silence for awhile, listening to each other breathe, and Adam tried to comprehend how, if Ronan was as drunk as he seemed, he didn't smell like liquor. And if he did, Adam was certainly close enough to smell it now. This was not okay. This was 12 different levels of not okay. Adam shot up, fully intending to walk away and keep working on his homework. But then Ronan spoke, and his voice was like a magnet, and Adam was the iron.
"So... How are you?"
Adam snorted. "You've been here for, what, an hour, and you're just asking now? You know, Lynch, most people ask that even before they burst into someone else's apartment." But he sat back down on the mattress next to Ronan, making sure their knees were touching.

I bet you never thought you would fall again
So much for keeping this, just friends
Shut up and kiss me now
And we carry on

They sat in companionable silence for a time, thinking. And all Adam could think about was Ronan, this beautifully broken boy next to him. And what it would be like to kiss him. Which was ridiculous, of course, because he knew Ronan didn't even like him back. It was a fact that Adam Parrish could never be the object of anyone's affections, much less Ronan's, who could have anyone he chose. But then Adam thought about that, the trip to the Barns, the shopping cart, how he ran out of school to make the trial, and Adam could only conclude that Ronan, did, as a matter of fact, have a crush on him. The knowledge floored him. And he didn't know how to handle it. Was it even proper to have Ronan in here, the two of them, alone?
"Hey? Ronan?" Adam whispered.
"God, Adam, I'm not asleep or drunk or anything. What do you want to say?"
Adam registered that Ronan wasn't drunk. That he came to St. Agnes because he wanted to, not because he was inebriated. It made him glow a little inside.
"I know. About...you."
Ronan stared at him with hard eyes, eyes like scalpels. "What about me? Don't be so fucking mysterious."
Adam knew he got one shot at this. This moment, right now, could ruin this fragile thing between them, or it could bring them somewhere else. Somewhere better. And Adam didn't know what to say. So he kissed Ronan instead. And it was everything.
Ronan pulled away after a few seconds, eyes wide, looking more innocent than Adam had ever seen him. "Are you...sure? Because we can just be friends, if that's what you want. I don't want a pity relationship. Especially not with you."
Adam looked the other boy in the eye, and said, "I've never been so sure of anything in my life."
And this time, Ronan kissed him first, and it was even better than their first kiss.