Finding you

Part 1

Fuck.

Remus froze by the door, the keys still dangling in his hand. The sight in front of him was one that never promised anything good; the smell of smoke and beer was strong, making the air in the room feel heavy and loaded. He could already feel the cold sweat at the back of his neck. He considered opening the door again and just leaving the house, but then one of the men sitting in the living room glanced up, and his eyes landed right on Remus, smirking, making Remus' muscles lock in disgust.

Remus knew the two men all too well. He knew their names, but never thought of them if he could avoid it; they brought too many bad memories. The dark-haired one -who was still looking at Remus- was the worst; the one with dirty blond curls was just a stupid pawn. Both of them were sprawled on the couch, talking loudly as if they were in their own house, their dirty boots propped on the coffee table that Remus had cleaned that very morning.

Their visits were becoming more and more frequent, and Remus didn't miss how they always coincided with Lyall's worst episodes. He was pretty sure they actually encouraged them for their own amusement.

His sorry excuse of a father followed his friend's gaze then, finally noticing Remus still standing by the front door. Remus gulped as Lyall's bleary eyes became darker.

"Where the fuck were you?"

"At work." He tried to come out strong, but the sound of the keys clinking in his trembling hand betrayed his attempt.

Lyall stood up and took a couple of wobbly steps closer to Remus, bracing a hand on the shelf on the wall to support himself. Behind him, the man with raven black hair looked Remus up and down slowly, licking his lips. Remus felt dirty being watched like that.

"I told you I was having people over. I ordered you to come back to make dinner for us," said Lyall, glaring at him. Remus felt his blood boil.

"Well someone has to bring money to pay the bills, since you are too busy being a lazy ass drunkard."

He regretted the words as soon as they left his lips, it was not smart of him to talk like that right now. But he was just overwhelmed by the unfairness of it all.

"Don't talk to me like that, you fucking brat!" Lyall yelled, swinging his arm violently over the shelf he'd been holding, and throwing everything on top of it to the floor.

Remus watched horrified as the silver frame that had his mother's picture fell through the air, arching as if in slow motion. It landed viciously on the hardwood floor. When he heard the loud crack it made, Remus felt his heart shattering as well.

The sound sprang him into motion for the first time since stepping into this godforsaken house. He rushed over, kneeling on the floor next to the small shards scattered all over the floor. One of them dug itself into his knee, but Remus barely even noticed it. He was looking at the frame, the glass had cracked into a million pieces, forming sharp spiderwebs that spreaded over Hope's smiling face.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Remus yelled, holding it close to his chest with both arms, protecting it like his life depended on it. Maybe it did.

He was using all of his strength to fight the tears; he would not cry in front of these men. Standing up slowly, he glared at Lyall. Remus could have sworn that he saw regret in his eyes for a moment, but it was gone the minute Remus spoke again.

"You disgust me," he spat.

Lyall's eyes glinted, and if Remus hadn't been holding his mother's picture he would have raised his arms to protect his head. As it was though, Lyall's fist connected with his jaw, making his head snap to the side painfully. He'd punched him with the full strength of a drunken adult, which made Remus see stars dancing in his vision and stumble back, while the two guys behind them cackled loudly.