Past and Future (SemiShira)

6. Wednsesday

Okay, uh, so this first part is like, pretty sad. But I promise it gets better :3

The rest of the book will be somewhat fluff :)

ANYWAYS TRIGGER WARNINGS:
Self-Harm
Self-Doubt
Crying
Rape/Sexual abuse

That should be it I believe unless you wanna include Shirabu's mom slapping people-

My tummy hurts too :(

Anyways hope you enjoy

Shirabu sat alone in his room holding his knees to his chest, curled up in a ball. He had tears fall down his cheek every now and then as he sat there and thought.

'You're a dumbass...no. It was his fault. His fault.'

"It was his fault! He wanted to know, so it was his fault!!" Shirabu said aloud trying to convince himself.

But he knew it was his fault. He had no reason to yell, to cause a scene, however it happened.

That's not what Shirabu was most upset about though. He actually didn't know why he was so upset. Maybe because he had exposed himself? Maybe because he let his emotions get the best of him? He asked himself these questions but he knew the real reason.

He had yelled at Semi. Caused an argument with Semi, and while yes, this happened all the time, this one was different. He could see the guilt of look on Semi's eyes. The hurt in Semi's eyes. Shirabu felt like he ruined everything they built up.

"Semi hates me. Semi hates-"

"No. Semi doesn't hate you..."

Shirabu poked his head up from his knees and looked at his door. It was still closed, but he recognized that voice.

"What do you want?!"

"To apologize."

Shirabu stayed silent and Semi on the other side of the door took it as an opportunity to speak.
"I'm sorry for pushing you. I'm sure you didn't want to answer because it was personal, but I forced you...and I apologize for that. I'm sorry for making you cry too. I really am."

There was silence for about a minute.

"Do you mean it...?"

"Yes Shirabu I do. Please let me in-"

Before Semi even finished his sentence Shirabu opened his door wiping away his tears. Semi seeing this pulled Shirabu into a hug. Shirabu trusting this apology hugged him back and cried into Semi's chest.

They stayed like that for a few moments Semi waiting until Shirabu was ok enough to pull away.

Finally Shirabu pulled away even though he still had tears and said, "I-I'm sorry...y-your not gonna- hurt me..? P-Please..."

"I didn't mean to hurt you, and I don't wanna hurt you.."

Shirabu wiped away his tears once again before Semi realized he had more cuts on his arm probably due to the yelling the previous day.

"Shirabu..." Semi said rubbing his fingers over Shirabu's arms.
"Please tell me what's wrong..."

Shirabu just cried back into Semi's chest again, and Semi pulled him back and slowly made his way to Shirabu's bed with him. They stayed like that for a long time before Shirabu stopped sobbing, but still laid in Semi's chest.

Shirabu wasn't sure what to say. The only people he's ever told about middle school was his mom and dad. Shirabu wasn't even sure if sexual assault (he didn't like the word rape) was a common thing to talk about. If every kid went through what he did.