WRITTEN IN THE MOMENT

DID IT JUST KICK ??

It's been 7 weeks since I found out I'm prego .

Thank god for its not noticeable , I don't know what would happen if my parents found out .

I've been thinking of telling the baby daddy about his kid and all but I don't wanna freak him out . I mean we just hooked up after a party on the night of a school dance .

I look out the window of math class and rub my belly .
I sigh , what am I going to do ? I already feel the hormones kicking in . Just last night I was eating a pint of mint ice cream and some of it got on me , I burst into tears .
Unable to handle that I had a dot of ice cream on me . Pathetic .

I told only one person and I don't even know who she is . I met her on Facebook , seems nice . I had no one else okay ? I don't really have much friends , more of a loner .

The one person if consider my friend is a girl I share lab with .

Whatever I don't need friends , there not going to help me give birth .

Rain drops from outside slide down the window . Betting on the rite rain drop to go down before the left does .
Come on ritey you can do it ! --
" oh my god " I yelp and clutch my stomache .
What was that ?

Everyone turns to me , including the creator of the little flipper .

" can I help you ? " the teacher asks me in a patronizing tone .

" c-can I please go out ?" I choke .

Tears sting my eyes .

" ye yes you can " he allows me shocked I'm about to burst into tears .

I run out without looking at anyone .

Running anywhere , I i sit on the floor of .... The Chem lab ?

I look down at my little tiny bump ? And rub it .
Tump
What ? Did it just kick , oh my god it kicked !

My eyes tear up . I felt it , I FEEL it kicking.
" oh thank god " I sob .

I lay my head against the teachers desk . Closing my eyes as I say my silent prayers , thanking God for this little squish I have in me .

" cressa !" I hear someone call from outside .
I stay silent and open my eyes . Sitting up straight .
"Cressaaaaaa " the voice calls .

I recognize it , it's the father . " no please don't come here" I whisper .

" cressa " he says and his head pops in from the doorway . " God cressa I was looking everywhere for you " he comes toward me .

I stare at him , then squeeze my eyes shut . If I say it enough hell disappear .
Go away , go away , go away . Please please please --
" open your eyes cressa I'm not going anywhere " he says , he knows my method .

I open my eyes , he's bent down in front of me .
" cressa" he says softly .

It's like his voice caresses me . I try to steady my breathing from my fast beating heart .

" I -" I start but he cuts me off
" No , no " he says and brushes away the falling strands of my hair to the side. " you don't have to cress , i should've asked , known "

I scrunch up my face " you know ?" I ask gasping for air .

" well yeah it's kind of been going around " he says kind of confused I didn't know that's it's out .

" what ?!" I clutch my stomach " no no no ones suppose to know !" I freak .

" you can tell me cress why ?" He asks " I can't believe I haven't noticed that night , on your skin " he looks away ashamed .