The Wind Beneath Our Wings

Chapter 6

In loving memory of River Phoenix

The whole room had fallen into silence as soon as James' clapperboard had resonated, signaling the beginning of the scene.

The only sound that could be heard was that of the camera rolling.

My eyes were adamantly locked onto Joaquin's face, refusing to look away from him.

I could feel my heart thumping so loud inside my chest that it seemed it would break out of my rib cage anytime soon.

It seemed that my lungs had decided out of their own will to keep my breath into them until Joaquin's voice would fill the room.

His eyes seemed to be glistening with unshed tears. But he seemed to be unable to speak

A shiver ran through my body as a panic-stricken voice raised in my mind – a voice that I wished Joaquin could hear.

Come on, Joaq... Please speak your line

Phedon, our cinematographer, had made sure to place one of the cameras in such a way that it would capture a close shot of Joaquin's face as soon as he'd start talking. For some reason, I could tell that a particular emphasis would be placed on his glorious eyes.

Phedon intended to capture the pain that Joaquin would inevitably convey through his eyes – the same pain, the same sadness that Mister Cash had certainly felt when he has realized that his addiction to drugs had involuntarily led him to hurt his beloved June.

As for Tim, our sound recordist, I knew that he would make sure to capture the sound of Joaquin's voice with as much clarity as possible, even though he would speak in a sheer whisper.

A whisper that currently seemed to be refusing to leave Joaquin's throat.

A silent prayer surged from the depths of my being, as I closed my eyes.

Please Joaq... Speak up...

My eyes fleetingly wandered towards his hands.

He was holding the soft material of the blanket he was laying under with so much force that his knuckles had turned white.

The words that he was meant to speak certainly weighed upon his mind. He seemed to be struggling not to give them the power to crush him.

Yet another silent prayer addressed to Joaquin raised in my mind again.

Please don't let your mind take you back to your elder brother, Joaquin.

Don't let your mind trick you...

Turning to my left side, I let my eyes wander towards James' face. Surprisingly enough, I noticed that he was glancing at me as well. Our eyes locked for a split second. In his eyes, I noticed a glint that was betraying the state of confusion he was in. Nevertheless, he managed to smile at me - however frail it came across as - before he turned his attention back to the scene that Joaquin and Reese were meant to be performing.

I knew that, in only a split second, James would request Joaquin to deliver his line.

Whispers were already beginning to fill the room. Joaquin's silence was causing everyone, in our crew, to be as confused as James and I were. Despite the urge I felt to turn around and ask them all to keep silent, I chose to keep my eyes locked onto Joaquin's face.

I took a step forward, struggling to silence the voice, in my mind, that was dictating me to run to him and to find the right words to soothe his pain, at least a little bit.