ODE

Chapter 3

She locks herself in her private lab at L-Corp, studying the prototype closely. Lena connects it to her highly advanced computer and starts scanning the software and coding. Lena closes her eyes and takes a small DNA sample from her own finger. The drop of blood falls on top of a small platter, which is connected to her computer. Lena closes her eyes and focusses on her mother, her features, her proud smile in that old photograph. Her fingers start typing away, filling gaps in the code and adding new, more complex, elements. It takes a minute to upload. Lena gently grabs the contact lenses and places them on her eyes. She inhales deeply and lets the prototype activate.

She’s suddenly standing in a field on a sunny afternoon. The sunrays almost feel warm against her skin. It feels real, but not quite. Lena quietly watches the scene in front of her.

“Not so fast, Lena! I’m going to get you!” A younger Alodie with a flowery dress jokingly exclaims as she runs after a small child. She eventually grabs her and spins her around. Both her mother and her younger version laugh happily. A tear escapes Lena’s eye and rolls down her cheek.

It’s not even real, she knows that. This might as well not even be a real memory, just a glimpse of a moment she may have made up. Nonetheless, Lena’s heart aches at the loving display in front of her. The carelessness, the clear joy on their features. Lena feels a longing she’s long ago buried.

“I’m going to make you better, mother.” Lena promises shakily.

She watches them for a little longer and then closes her eyes.

“End simulation.”

__________________

Lena only shows up in her office when she has a meeting she absolutely cannot cancel. Even if it takes only thirty minutes of her time, it feels like a complete waste. She’s close to another breakthrough and she knows it.

She politely greets the older man and discusses some upcoming investments that would most definitely be beneficial for L-Corp. But she can’t really bring herself to care much. Thankfully, handling herself in meetings has become like second nature to her, so even with half her brain switched off, she manages to end it successfully. The board will be pleased.

Lena watches the man leave her office. She’s about to stand up and return to her lab when somebody knocks on the door. Lena’s head shoots up and she locks eyes with Kara, who’s hesitantly standing in the door opening with a large brown bag from Big Belly Burger. Lena sighs and watches as Kara slowly walks into her office.

“Hi.” Kara says nervously, fiddling with her glasses.

“Look, Kara, I’m really busy.” Lena tries, standing up and gathering the files she signed during the meeting.

“I know you are. And I know you keep forgetting to eat.” Kara holds up the bag with a small smile.

Lena wants to decline, but she can’t ignore the slight dizziness she feels from the lack of food in her stomach.

“Fine.” Lena sighs, making her way over to the couch. Kara beams as she places the bag on the table in front of her.

The silence lays heavy between them. Lena opens the wrapping to reveal a tasty burger, her stomach is almost screaming for it.

Kara joins her on the couch and Lena feels a strange urge to reach out and touch her. God, does she miss their hugs. But she can’t give in. Kara’s broken her trust, she’s broken her heart. Even now, after everything, Kara still doesn’t trust her enough to tell her the truth. Everything feels fake, like an act. As if Lena’s watching world’s longest Broadway show ever performed. Every single gesture, every smile, every hug, did it all mean nothing? Was their entire friendship just a way for Kara, Supergirl, to keep an eye on the new evil Luthor in town? 

“What are you thinking about?” Kara breaks the silence and Lena realises she must’ve been observing her the entire time.

Lena lowers her burger and lets out a humourless laugh. She can’t take the pretence anymore. She’s sick and tired of it.

“You were never going to tell me, were you?” Lena asks tiredly. Kara frowns in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

Lena’s laugh is void of emotion, she shakes her head in disbelief.

“You know, I thought you were the kindest and most selfless person I’d ever met, when I first got to know you.” Lena begins, her expression growing sour. “I was a fool. I should’ve known better.”

Kara’s smile vanishes immediately. She opens her mouth only to close it again.

“You never really trusted me, did you? You were waiting for me to snap and finally become the villain I’m meant to be.” Lena huffs.

“What? What are you talking about? Of course I trust you.” Kara tries, looking at her with wide eyes.

“Just- drop the act, Kara. I’m tired.” Lena stoically replies, keeping her voice as steady as she can. She gets up to pour herself a glass of whiskey, turning her back towards her former friend.

“Lena?” Kara tries softly, but Lena doesn’t turn around.

“Why don’t you fly off somewhere?” Lena mumbles and quickly downs her drink.

Behind her, Kara freezes up completely, but Lena doesn’t see that. Though, she can sense the change in the room.

“You know?” Kara’s voice sounds small.

Lena doesn’t reply, she just pours herself another glass.

“How did- I really wanted to tell you, Lena. It’s just- it’s too dangerous.”

Lena grimaces against her glass. She turns around with fire in her eyes.

“Lex told me, right before I put a bullet in his chest.” Lena says sharply, taking a quick sip. “Everyone knew, but me. Am I right?” Lena chuckles humourlessly. “Alex, obviously, James, Winn, Brainy, Nia, Kelly…”

“Kelly doesn’t know.” Kara whispers sadly.

Lena arches an eyebrow and harshly puts her glass down on the table.

“They’ve all been lying to me. I trusted them, I trusted you!” Lena exclaims, hating how her voice cracks a little.

“I-I didn’t want to lie to you. I really didn’t, I hated it! But it was for your own safety. I- I am so sorry, Lena. I never meant to hurt you.” Kara’s eyes are watering.

“I need you to leave. Right now.” Lena says harshly and Kara visibly flinches at her words.

“I’m sorry.” Kara whispers sadly and takes her leave.