Broken Like Me

Chapter Eight: Defeat

Kageyama sat in silence as he was accosted by a barrage of questions. The accusations and reprimands hung in the air, suffocating Kageyama with their heaviness.

He refused to give a proper explanation to Dr.Sugawara about the fight. His body refused to budge from his chair, having lost all willingness to move weighed down by earlier overexertion. He didn't have it in him to repeat what Tsukshima had said to him, he didn't want to poison his tongue with cruel words of a bitter reality that had driven him mad. Despite deep hatred of Tsukishima, he would never expose his relationship with Yamaguchi. Kageyama might be an asshole, he might have been called emotional constipated more than once, but he didn't out people regardless of circumstance.

So his lips remained locked shut by a combination of his own pride, stubbornness and anger. He focused his eyes elsewhere, in his attempt to distract himself from Dr.Sugawara's scolding gaze. He stared blankly at Dr.Sugawara's desk, it was decorated with an assortment of various trinkets and knick knacks, the wall behind it was decorated with an assortment of letters and cards from previous patients. His little cactus plant looked well cared for, it's small buds glistening with moisture. The nice wooden frame propped near the center of the desk caught Kageyama's attention. The glossy photo intensified the glimmer of the silver haired Doctor's smiling face, he looked much younger in the photo his eyes were younger, softer, less weighed down by experience and the wrinkles that came with it. Dr.Sugawara had his arm happily slung around the shoulder of a stocky brown haired man who had an equally kind smile and lively demeanor. The other man was turned ever so slightly facing Dr.Sugawara in the picture, he's eyes indicated that he was undeniably smitten with the doctor. Kageyama was hit by a strong sense of déjà vu, the man looked very familiar, where had he seen him before? Then it hit him quite suddenly, and he cursed his diminished attention span, the man in the picture was the same nurse that had apprehended him earlier and taken him to the infirmary.

What was the nurses name again...Daichi?...the nurse had introduced himself as Sawamura Daichi. He had pinned Kageyama to the ground with extraordinary strength and fixed him with a frightening gaze warning him to try anything as he led him out of the ward by force. He had a foreboding presence that rivaled that of Kageyama's father, he radiated a sense of authority. However, his intensity seemingly dissipated and was quickly replaced with concern, once his gaze fixated onto Kageyama's injured wrist, which was leaving a bloody imprint on his scrubs. As soon as they arrived at the infirmary Nurse Daichi anxiously began to perform first aid until a doctor arrived to examine his wrists.

As Daichi gently peeled back Kageyama's bandage, slowly revealing the gory site within, he could tell that Daichi was struggling to swallow down his revulsion in an attempt at professionalism. Daichi was clearly worried that he had exacerbated the injury, while manhandling Kageyama. Kageyama was aware enough to hiss in pain as his injury was dabbed with disinfectant, but the sight of the jagged semi healed incision on his wrists didn't repulse him. He was somewhat fascinated by how the shades of purple, red and blue starkly contrasted with pale skin leaving the combination quite striking, a grotesque palette of colors. Strangely enough the sight reminded him of how his arm would look after a particularly grueling day of practicing his receives. The bruises on his arms often stood as a testament of his dedication to his sprout, he would often soak himself in the shower after a long day observing the bruises with a sense of satisfaction. He found the resemblance between the two somewhat comforting.

Kageyama wasn't proud of his scars, if anything he was currently obsessed with hiding them. He knew he would have two twin scars branding him for the rest of his life. His mother had sighed disappointedly last time they met, kindly reminding him what a shame it was that he would be marred by ugly scars forever. He figured it was his punishment for failing his attempt, a gruesome reminder permanently carved into his very skin that would inevitably remind him of that day. After his wounds were thoroughly inspected and wrapped by another doctor, he was deemed to no longer be a violent threat and had been taken to Dr.Sugawara's office.