Anemoia. A pretty word, isn't it? Nostalgia for something you've never experienced. Hate to say it, but, no, it really isn't. It had always borne nothing more than pain for me.
Well, it wasn't always this way. It hadn't been of any significance to me before, up until I met Jamie in this reality, that is. Then after we started dating, we'd listen to music together, and, well, I would disappear.
Disappear, as in, completely, according to Jamie, at least. My body would be gone, and my clothes would be left behind, and she'd have no clue where or when I was, only knowing what song had pulled me away from the current time.
She'd thought I was dead, or worse, taken by whatever paranormal spirits lurked at Bly, but contrary to what she'd imagined, my blips were much more enjoyable in the sense that it was everything I ever wanted to experience in my life.
Imagine listening to your favorite song and suddenly finding yourself back in the past, reliving a memory, a memory that seemed to be tinged with a dream-like quality around the edges, making you unsure of whether it was a dream or not, whether it actually happened, or it was all in your head.
At first, as anyone would be, she was alarmed, but once I told her the things I saw in the time I traveled to, the amazing, lucid-dreamlike memory I relived, well, let's just say she didn't force me to see a doctor after that.
Not that seeing one would help. They'd only think I was crazy, or she was crazy, or both of us were crazy. And honestly, I always come back in one piece, so there's really no reason to be alarmed.
The downside of everything is the surreality of it. Every day I wake up, questioning whether this is reality or not, or what time period I'm in, but then I remember I've got Jamie with me, and nothing else seems to matter, all the debating inside my head quiets down and fades into the background.
Now, normally my situation is pretty bearable, and it pains me beyond words to say it, but she's gotten used to it too, and it hurts me a lot that she has to put up with my disappearances for indefinite periods of time.
My blips usually happen once or twice a month, at most, but then I had one today that lasted from around 6pm until 1am this morning, longer than most of my other episodes. Hence, my caring girlfriend told me to record a log of what happened exactly, and what song I blipped to. Which is what this whole thing is about.
This is the story of how I traveled into memories I don't even have.
