6: In Which She Sees Double
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“What's cracking, Mother Teresa?”I felt a slap on the back of my head and turned around in my seat on the couch, glaring at Erin. “Are we back in high school now?”
Erin sniffed the air. “I smell...someone who hasn't gotten díck in a month.” She leaned over the back of the couch and sniffed me like an eager puppy. “The smell seems to be getting stronger...and stronger...”
I slapped her away, laughing. “What the hell is up with you?”
“Nell, I've come to pick you up, OK?”
“We just saw each other about half an hour ago, Er. If you wanted to go out, why didn’t you tell me then?”
She threw her handbag onto the couch and climbed over, plopping down beside me. “Because you practically went Usain Bolt out the office! It was quite good fun to watch, actually.”
I rolled my eyes at her exaggeration, turning down the volume of the Supernatural re-run I was in the middle of. “I had someone swinging by to have a peek at the apartment,” I explained to her. “You know, now that Prince is moving out.”
“Ah,” Erin said, grinning. "The Exodus of the Buck Fuddy. Catchy title, don’t you think?”
I forced a laugh out. Truthfully, it was Prince's idea for him to move out on the grounds that our relationship was becoming incredibly “unhealthy”. I couldn't disagree there. Despite Paige giving me the all-clear, I was still so deeply ashamed of what had happened. STDs had never even crossed my mind before I caught one from Prince of all people, someone I trusted with my life.
Adding insult to injury, I'd probably given it to Stephen. I hadn’t seen him in a little over a month, though, so I wasn’t too sure but there was no way I was going to go up to him and ask. Plaisir had become a no-go zone. I was probably on the restaurant’s persona non grata list. I didn’t blame Stephen. Or Stella.
“Seriously, why don't you move in with me, Er?” I asked for the billionth time, giving her my best version of puppy-dog eyes.
Strangely, she averted her eyes. “Janelle, you know how much I love my apartment. Besides, the rent is brilliant! You'd probably try to rob me.” Returning her eyes to me, she stuck her tongue out at me in the normal-Erin fashion, before glancing at her watch. "OK, get your sexy arse into the bedroom and change. We’re going to be late.”
“Late for what?” I almost didn’t want to know. Erin’s idea of excitement was a stratosphere above mine.
“Book club, sweetie. Twilight’s this week’s book.”
***
“I can't believe I let you drag me here,” I groaned as Erin, with all the strength she possessed in her petite body, pushed me through the doors of the library.
“You don’t have clam chowder anymore, OK? You’re free to fuck.”
I wrinkled my nose. “Clam chowder?”
“Chlamydia, babe.” She sighed. “Look, Bella. All you have to do is scope out a Jacob or Edward – or both – and have some fantastic supernatural séx. I bet Stephen won’t even be here.”
“Is that what you think I'm worried about?” Oh, Erin knew me too fúcking well.
Erin paused, giving me an irritated look. “You got an STD. Big deal. In fact, I’m shocked you didn’t catch one sooner. For all Prince’s good looks and sex appeal, he's probably riddled with all kinds of diseases.” She gave me a serious look, eyes wide. “Some of them probably haven’t even been discovered yet.”
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The Book Club (18+ Only) [COMPLETED]
General Fiction[Edited Version] "We only read erotica," Fiona said with a straight face. "Come again?" I asked, clutching my copy of Jane Eyre to my chest. I suddenly felt like a girl who'd come to a fancy-dress party dressed as herself. "Oh, come on, Janelle," Fi...