"If you don't feel the same way, let me know", Marie asked, looking at him intently.
He smiled and turned over to answer texts on his phone.
Her mind was at once filled with the many voices that reminded her of how unloveable she was.
He turned again and asked, "what are you thinking about?".
She didn't answer. She was busy fighting the little demons in her mind.
"You're not good enough" ,
"He only kissed you because he was bored" ,
"You're worthless, ugly scum. Who would want you"
To herself, she confirmed their words.
"Who would want a girl with a mind so riddled with insecurities and mental issues", she thought.
She made up her mind. This would end the same way it always did. She thought she deserved better and shot higher.
She was going to be hurt again. Just like it always happened.
"What are you thinking about", he asked again, interrupting her thoughts.
She plastered on the most sincere smile she could come up with and said "oh nothing."
He gave the same intoxicating smile that made her fall for him and said "you have beautiful eyes, you know that?"
Her hormones skyrocketed but she knew the truth deep down.
He would never feel the same way.
She was just another passing fling to him and they both knew it as they lay there in awkward silence.
He would go back home and have a lovely life. Probably get a little stressed at his shitty office job but he would never understand how she felt.
She would go home, find her ropes and hope for the courage to jump of the chair into the warm darkness she'd read about.
