Dealing with Social Anxiety Disorder.

Now

Now I'm 20 years old and I love life. I have huge goals wich I'm certain that I will reach. I haven't been bullied for a very long time and I don't even remember the last time. I still have trouble meeting new people on my own, or start a conversatione you know. But otherwise I'm pretty confident and I don't really care anymore. Of course I care, but not very much. I'm still afraid of my old bullies, and that I don't understand myself. How can I be afraid of them still? It doesn't make sensce at all I think.

Anyways, I don't really see much people and I still have very few friends hwo I actually speak to and hwo cares about me. Point is I do have friends, only not very many. I still have my insecuritys and my mum haven't changed and I plan moving out as soon as possible, I just need to finnish my studies and get a job or move from the city to get a real education. 

I am at this time restudying the courses I failed in highschool because of my illness and I'm getting pretty good grades, I tell you! I'm so proud of myself! I won't ever see myself as useless anymore, even though other people might do. I don't care, cause' I'm so much better than them and I know it. 

My journey has been real tough, but I finnished it. My thoughts my never change, but atleast I believe in myself now and I don't want to kill myself. 

I wonder what would've happened if I did kill myself? STOP. That's not even worth thinking about. 

NOW, Let's have a great life!