Princess // c.tartaglia [discontinued]

Chapter 1 : Despair

Y/N!

You abruptly opened your eyes, panting, cold sweat was running down your skin. Clenching your sheets you started crying again. The same nightmare, the same realization kept hitting you. You were all alone in this world and the horrible, disastrous things you saw when you first came to this world was unfathomable. You had no idea if your brother was even alive or not. Calming yourself down and taking the medications near your bed you looked out the window.

It was still dark out, the sun hasn't risen and the cold gentle breeze was swept into the room. Good. The weather was nice. Wearing a blanket over yourself, you opened the balcony door and looked at the stars. The only things that never changed whenever you and your brother traveled cross worlds were the stars. Shining ever so brightly and dazzling the night sky, you could never tire from the view. They were the only things that felt like home in this unfamiliar place.

Sitting on the ramp, you started swinging your legs and humming a tune. At times like these you always wandered when did things go wrong. The goddess who messed with you and your brother, the atrocities of this world, this feeling of loss and confusion.... The only good thing that happened was meeting the Tsarita, your savior, the one who gave you a place to stay, a place to belong, taking care of you and sharing your burdens. One night she asked you if you wanted to help her cause.  You of course responded enthusiastically and positively to this idea.

"I'm thinking of making you join our cause. What do you say Y/n?" She asked giving you a sickly sweet smile.

"I'd love too! You've only been kind and gracious to me, I'm indebted to you"

"That's a good girl Y/n, you're just like the daughter i always wanted. You can call me mother you know?" She smiled again holding your hands. You blushed a bit, you've never really had a motherly figure in your life seeing as you and your brother were orphans.

"Okay then m-mother, when do I start" Stuttering at the word mother, she chuckled a bit.

"First show me what you have. If you can defeat my strongest fatui agent you will hold a place. If you can't, well it won't be too pretty now would it?" Stroking your head, you felt a sense of fear creeping up on you, what were the repercussions of you failing? It sent shivers down your spine just thinking about it. Mother had high expectations of you and all you could do was showed her your talents in combat.

The fatui agent was strong, he was a big gun wielding cryo ogre, he'd just be immune to your cryo vision so you had to think of other ways to put him down. He kept shooting and punching, like he was ordered to kill you. Surely mother would not order such a thing, right? The fear of losing your life or having to take another life crept up on you. Never in your worldly travels had you taken a human life. Punches, kicks, stabs were being thrown, you were clearly too weak and powerless against him.

The fight dragged on, as you were nearing your end, you started thinking. Technically he's not human but humanoid, he's a monster, killing him would prove beneficial right? You needed to survive and he would die either way so you killing him would be merciful right? The fatigue and the pain were messing up your head all you knew is that if you don't kill him he'll kill you and you needed to survive. Seeing mother watching you, sighing as she was walking away. The adrenaline and the fear of disappointment made you move and.......

With one stab straight to the gut you killed him. Blood spilled and you stood there panting, looking at your hands, bloodied and scratched, you thought.... was this despair? Tears welled over your eyes but without looking at the corpse, you walked towards your mother, who was was walking towards you now opening her arms with joy.

"M-mother I d-did it-t" As you said those words you collapsed into her arms, the last thing you saw was your mother's big and wide smile, her eyes glowing with joy and the feeling off warmth she gave off.

"You did excellent child."

All of that leads to now, the 1st of the fatui Harbingers, Princess.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door.

"Come in" Mother's attendant was walking in, bowing to you.

"Princess, the Tsarita requires your presence" She calmly says, her eyes dead as the moon. Everyone here had the same bleak look, one of dread and despair.

"Understood, tell her I'm getting ready." You went down the ramp and looked at the sky, the sun was coming up. Sunlight was signaling a new day. With one last look at the sky you turned around and went to get ready.