The Big Deal

DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fan fiction borrowing characters from the Naruto universe, which is trademarked by Masashi Kishimoto. I do not claim ownership over any of the characters or settings and make no money from publishing this story.

WARNING: This work of fiction is Rated MA and only suitable for mature audiences. It may contain explicit language, adult themes and graphic descriptions of a violent and/or sexual nature.

. . .

The Big Deal

by j.j. scriptease

. . .

Naruto was humming merrily in his kitchen when a loud bang rattled his front door.

The racket cut his tune short and ceased his ramen preparation. Clad in pyjamas, he stood frozen in suspense wondering who'd visit him this early on a Saturday morning. It couldn't be a mission and he certainly hadn't invited anyone over. While he racked his brains, a second loud bang blasted the front door clean off its hinges, sending it flying across his apartment!

He shrieked as the door-turned-torpedo crashed into the wall. The impact shook the entire building.

What the hell?!

Naruto tripped over himself rushing to investigate. He gawked at his front door lodged into the living room wall. It had left a trail of sawdust and destruction after ploughing through his furniture, strewing the floor with broken chairs and table legs.

He coughed from all the dust the commotion had kicked up, trying to bat it clear with his hand. Who the hell would do this? Pissed off, he whipped around to confront the door-crasher in the archway, a silhouette shrouded in dust. Fury fizzed on the tip of his tongue, itching to be unleashed on the perpetrator. But as the cloud of dust dissipated and the figure grew clearer, Naruto gulped down his indignation.

"Sa-Sakura-chan...?"

She stood in his doorway as if she owned it, clad in the Leaf Village Cloak with her boot raised high and smoking from the forceful kick.

Naruto began apologising before he even knew what he'd done wrong.

She cut him off. "Where is he?"

"Huh? He?" A part of Naruto was relieved he didn't appear to be the focal point of her rage, for once, but it still begged the question who was, and why did this infuriated kunoichi think he'd know where to find them? "What's this about?"

Sakura grunted and marched into his apartment, evoking another shriek. "Don't play dumb with me, Naruto!" She grabbed him by the shirt and got in his face. "Where are you hiding him? He did this on purpose, didn't he?"

"Sakura-chan! Calm down. I have no idea what you're talking about!"

She threw him aside like garbage then proceeded to search his apartment, checking the bathroom, the kitchen, under his bed, and even looking inside his fridge. Who the heck did she think could possibly be hiding in there?

Her rage must've gotten the better of her senses, as it tended to. She seized his bowl of fresh, steaming ramen.

His heart skipped a beat.

"No, don't!" He pled with both hands raised as she held his breakfast hostage.

"I know you're in it together. If you don't tell me where he is, I'm throwing this out!"