she remembered when she first saw him. he had horribly failed at the 3dmg aptitude test, managing to flip himself fully upside down and hit his head. but when he tried again the next day, he succeeded. he showed his strength and perseverance, which was what she thought first attracted her to him.
she first talked to him on the 104th corps' expedition into the snowy mountains. they were co-leaders of their group, which meant they had to work and talk together. but she didn't mind it and found that she quite enjoyed talking to him. he was strong willed and passionate, ever so determined to eradicate the titans and gain freedom outside the walls. he was impulsive and hot-headed, but wasn't afraid to speak his mind. she admired him for that, and that day on the snowy mountains was the start of a turbulent relationship.
she remembered the first time she lost him. the titans were overunning the trost district and she was assigned to squad 32 with jean. they were soon overrun with titans and had to stake out on a roof. she had tried to look for eren, but only found armin who was sitting, with his head in his hands. she didn't have to ask him what had happened. she knew eren was gone. in that moment, with grief and loss overcoming her, she had realized that she was in love with him all along.
she didn't tell him that she loved him until the battle of shiganshina. he was just about to turn into a titan to bait reiner when she gripped tightly onto his hand and told him those three words. she didn't give him any time to answer, leaving him behind to turn into a titan. the following battle was horrible, with heavy casualties for the survey corps, including their own commander. but eren was now able to respond to her. they sat on top of the wall, looking out over his hometown, while eren told her the same words she told him. he loved her.
how could someone you thought you knew so well change so drastically? she had known him for seven years, four of which they embraced their love for each other. but he had changed. he left them, without any warning, and hid himself in marley. he didn't even feel the need to tell her, the one he said that he loved. and when he laid destruction to liberio, killing not only the military officials, but innocents too... she wasn't sure she knew him anymore.
the times following eren's destruction in marley only got worse. he had sided with zeke, going against his own friends, and her. he told mikasa that he hated her... he fought against armin... but most of all, he broke her heart.
when she found out that eren hadn't sided with zeke, she was hopeful. but that hope didn't last for long. instead of just using the rumbling to destroy marley's forces, he led the titans all the way to marley itself. his desire for freedom had gone too far, far enough to cause destruction worldwide.
they were transported to the point where the paths crossed. she saw eren there, who was younger. all of them tried one last desperate chance to convince him to stop. but he wouldn't listen and continued the rumbling... he had become a slave, a slave to his desire for freedom. she could fool herself no longer. the eren she knew, the eren she loved, was gone.
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GONE, e.jaeger (manga spoilers!)
Fanfiction-just a one shot -lowercase intended -pls lmk of any typos! -MANGA SPOILERS!