Walking in the street has never felt so lonely as I lead myself to my work. Hundreds of people rush through the street, yet it feels as if I'm the lesftovers which remained in fridge; it's so cold here and none of these people bothers to get me out of that state.
Nobody sees me. But then again, who in this place can see a ghost?
This is what I am, for a week, but really feels like months. A week ago I was happy, with my fiancé. A week later, here I am- alone, without even a proper place to live.
No matter how hard I try to understand how the fuck I got to this low place- I'm with loss of answers.
Love. Love led me to this. Disrespectful love, may I add. I want to believe that John loves me, well, loved.
It was three moths ago when he proposed to me in Paris, then I thought he can't surprise me more. But oh no, that was until last week; when all the air had left from my lungs after watching every part of the way he was cheating on me.
I left our apartment that day, he has made it pretty easy to be on his place- he paid the most of the money for the big house we used to live in together talk - and I was in shock that he made impossible for me to get up from my fall.
I still don't get the way he did it, he was so cold and made it clear that he has no excuses for this.
"You can have the ring, if you want," was the last thing he said before I got in my car.
"Look at this," I got the ring in my hand and threw it in his eye, proud of my shot. "looks pretty when it's closer to the eye, right?" I shouted before driving away, leaving him cursing me for the scar he'll might as well get.
Today, when I woke up, I knew that I can feel sorry for myself for the rest of the year, but I shouldn't waste my time on that. I already cried too much, wished to that hole in my heart to disappear for the thousandth time, and drank more than I used to in my 21 years of life.
Thinking that if I won't show up for work today, I will loose my only job, is what that brought me back to the huge building in front of me. The first time I walked in this buliding is when John brought me here, and I was terrified to get inside. Now, when I have my intership here and I need to walk through the huge heavy door, I feel even more terrified than the first time.
Wishing that I won't bump into John, I force my legs to get inside since it's freezing. I geuss the season improves itself. Have I already mentioned that I hate the winter?
When I walk in I see Natalie, the secretary, and basically the only lady who cares for me, waving at me so I go to say hello without looking to the other sides just incase that John will pop out from his cave.
"Hey girl! Long time no see!" She stands up and hugs me tightly.
"yeah, it's been a while," I manage to say. "How was Christmas?" I ask and she starts to talk about everything- which is really good -because then I don't have time to expose my sad disaster right now. Although I will tell her about that soon, I just don't feel like doing it right now.
It was refreshinmg to hear about her happy stories since I don't have a lot of them after what John did, but I really have to go to my office to complete the unfinished work I left hanging on my desk.
This is exactly why I hate to put off things for later, now I don't have much time and I'm already stressed out about today.
I just hope that Mr. Grey won't be mad at me for all the days off I took, or for the delay with my work.
Mr. Grey had never seen to like me, I don't think that he must like me, but he is always cold towards me so I'm still surprised that he hasn't fired me.
I have one thing to do, which is to read un publiushed books and decide if they are good or not, and I can't even do this right.
I push the elevator's button and wait for it to come from the twentieth floor.
As the elevator's door opens, I gasp at the view of John holding hands with a tall and skinny blonde lady who seems to look more than 25.
When I search his face again, I see a frown and a little scar just above his left eye just like I assumed that he'll get.
"Who are you?" I ask out loud with a disgust voice without even thinking.
It amuses me each time that when I think he can't be more asshole than he already is, he shows me how wrong I am.
Right now, when he doesn't even look at me as he walks with her on his way to the hallway, I realize that he really isn't the man I used to know.
I want to jump on the idiot bitch and take her down but decide against it and walk into the elevator. I'm so mad. So mad that I don't care to call the lady in names even though I don't really know her.
I don't bother to swipe my tears away but I regret it the minute that the door opens before it gets me to my floor, reveals a dark figure that I can't see so much with my eyes burning of tears.
"Are you..." The other guy starts to ask but I dismiss him with a short nod, and silence fills the room. I don't look behind to see who it is so I won't think about meeting him again, and walk as fast as I can towards my office right when the door opens.
I feel rude because I ignored the guy, but really all I want to do is to drown into the long papers and cry to myself. And that's exactly what I did after I unlocked the office.
Three hours have passed, like in slow motion, and the thoughts about John and the blonde one helped my tears to appear every 20 minutes.
By the time I finish the last chapter and my fixes for the author , it's passed noom and I am so hungry.
Usually, I wouldn't call to the reception in order to get food, but I already shiver at the thought of going outside again.
When there is a knock on the door I get up and take my food from the young deliver and pay him. He smiles at me and I offer him a small smile, too. Not a real one, though, and close,the door behind.
I let out a groan when the warm crepe with the bacon hit my full mouth now, and I don't believe that the first time I ate both of them together was only at the motel a few days ago. It's probably my favorite one now.
The office's phone interrups my "fun" with the bacon which was left alone on the empty plate when the crepe is running down my throat.
"Anastasia Steele's talking," I answer the phone and cough. I need water.
"Mr. Grey wants to see you in his office in ten minutes." A low manly voice speaks and I choke.
"W-What?" I ask again so I'll be sure I heard right.
"He said that he doesn't like when people are running late, so you better be there in time." And with that, he hangs up.
Why the hell he wants me to meet him right now? Today? What have I already done that would cause it?
Mr. Grey doesn't make contact with people if there is no need- let alone small workers like me - and I cannot think about something else than that I did a huge mistake and he's mad at me.
6795 versions of things he can tell me, but force myself to get up and leave to his office, otherwise I will never find out.
Hey guys so I hope you like it so far! It's an imagine inspired by Fifty Shades Of Grey so there will be 2 or 3 parts!
Vote and comment what you think?:)
