Everytime In April

I remember it all...the screams of disaster, the head banging, crying of chaos. What have I done? You seem to move uneasy. You seem to move the opposite direction that I am heading to that we are all heading too.

And every time at night I pray in April that your face will soon fade away. I felt like letting you go. Letting this go.

And every time I have that sudden desire for your touch in April I become so weak. And it causes you pain. We all became vulnerable and fragile.

And every time I seem blind I make believe that you are here. Because its the only way I see clear.

And every time now and then in April I see your face in my dreams I'm in love but when I dream of your face but with someone else it haunts me.

And every time our love seems so strong. You come and break the barrier. And leave with the enemy. Why carry on without me darling?

And every time it's a sunny bright glowing day I make it rain. Yes, I may have made it rain. But please forgive me. Happiness costs us our life that's why we caused you pain.

Ohhhh.....

And now in this time of the month, I notice that what I wanted never came true back then but I was glad because I never wanted us to end even when I said I did. But now I realize that what I wanted back then is slowly coming true. Slowly watching us fade in 3 days or so that's how long we last. I shouldve been more thankful to see how strong we were to overcome that disaster and still remain in joy an smiles. I cant feel ever more regret than ever too not want us to end when knowing the best is to abolish it.

Why do we seem like strangers now?

The second the problem ended I laid to this melody. That is why whenever I hear it I think back to the bright and a little tint of pink in the walls. The air seemed so misty though the mist seemed so dark and black. The room was quiet when you left. And I laid back down on the bed breathing in and out of happiness. That we all were sorry we all forgave each other. And I closed my eyes. But didn't cry.

"I guess I need you baby"

~ April